It's just us
by Elikubi64
Summary: A year on since the prison fell, with no funeral home kidnapping, it's still just Beth and Daryl having given up all hope of finding the others. They've adapted to working as a partnership and while Daryl's taught Beth how to survive, she's shown him how to laugh. As both of them try to understand what the other means to them, they face walkers, claimers and the looming winter.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note**

 **Hello! Just a note to say this is a multi-chapter. Have a number of chapters already written - just adding.**

 **Thanks!**

"Really? Not even once?" Beth's voice rose with disbelief as she bounded excitedly along beside him, her plait swinging from side to side. Clearly, she was enjoying her newest game of finding out new things about Daryl. In this particular game, her fixation was on what he wore 'before'.

"Nope." He answered staring straight ahead, crossbow in front of him in his hands but lowered and walking with a smoothness to his step that Beth still hadn't quite mastered, even after months on the road together. Walking in the unbearable heat, he was as shiny and slick with sweat as she was, but after a good day finding a good haul, neither of them were letting it bother them.

"OK… what about chinos?" She asked, with a twinkle in her eye which she tried to mask with a straight face. He didn't answer, but the slide of his eyes to the side to look at her and a slight rise of his eyebrows showed he knew when he was being teased.

"Not even a salmon sweater?" This time, she couldn't even try and keep a straight face at the picture she was imagining and she finished the question with a high ringing giggle. As she laughed she skipped slightly ahead of him and started walking backwards facing him as if she didn't want to miss his reaction. She got what she was hoping for as he snorted at her question before could help himself.

"Told'ya before. This. This is exactly what I was wearing 'fore the turn." He smirked, looking straight ahead past her as he walked knowing how easy it was to wind her up during these little games.

"Bullshit! I was there when we found you those boots!" Beth playfully jabbed him in the ribs before she turned back to face the road and skipped ahead, earning a roll of the eyes from Daryl.

"Girl, don't you know we're in the middle'a nowhere? With dead people out to eat us? Last I checked, it ain't a time to _skip_." He called after her, frowning as he continued his same measured pace along the dirt road, which they had found about two miles back. They had discussed all the possible things it might lead to and all the pros and cons before taking a joint decision to follow it.

It had been like this since about three months after the prison fell, which judging by the beating hot summer sun, was around a year ago now. They now made all decisions as a partnership, talking through all the possible risks and outcomes if they were about to do something big. Even with Daryl's style of being brief and to the point, Beth found that these planning and strategy conversations had helped her to learn how to survive in this world and gave her the confidence that she deserved to be there, surviving by Daryl's side.

Even so, it was conversations like today's which were her favourite, where she teased Daryl to the end of his patience about something, usually trying to paint a picture of him 'before' that contradicts as much as possible with the rough and ready Daryl that she knows now. Right after the prison, she never would have dreamed of playing this game. The Daryl she knew then would have believed she was mocking his past and probably would have left her then and there.

Over time though, things had changed. Daryl had come to learn who Beth really was; that she was good to the core and would never ever do anything to hurt anyone. He had come to like her self-assurance around him and looked forward to conversations like these ones where she tried to push the boundaries with him. He had taken to making it his mission to try to keep a straight face, masking over the sense of anticipation he felt when she kicked things off with her first question.

Sometimes, he caught himself thinking about how much he liked that it was just the two of them. With a year since they'd lost their group, he'd all but given up hope of trying to find them. While she passionately insisted they were still alive out there, the day they agreed their priority was surviving and not searching a few months back, he knew she'd near enough given up too.

And it's not like in that time they hadn't considered joining another group. Hell, they nearly did once, back in the winter when Daryl had felt a sense of desperation creep in after they'd spent three days walking non-stop in the biting cold in search of shelter. A young man had caught them both off guard while they were sat shivering next to a pathetic looking fire, too cold to have fully been on alert to what was around them. The stranger's promise of an abandoned gas station with warmth and food sounded too good to be true and, when he suddenly grabbed Beth by the hair as she walked beside him, turns out it was.

Within a beat of the strange man grabbing her, before any of them had a chance to work out what he planned to do next, Daryl grabbed him and rammed a knife into his throat. Without a word to Beth he'd grabbed her hand and ran them for miles at a punishing pace in the other direction, with Beth protesting the whole way that there probably was never even a group so they had no need to run now that the man was dead. Even so, they decided after that they didn't need a new group and got good at disappearing into the trees at the sound of any voices.

Daryl had to stop himself from physically shivering as he remembered that winter, the fear of freezing death and each day bringing a new struggle of finding food and shelter. He frowned to himself, thinking about how in a few months time they'd need to do it all over again.

Today though, things were better. They'd eaten well last night in an abandoned hunters cabin and Beth had squealed with delight when she'd found a brand new camping tent, still in it's bag, tucked under the bed. Strapped to her backpack now and bouncing lightly as she walked ahead of him, both of them knew it wouldn't keep out the walkers, but having something that could pass as a shelter in an emergency was better than nothing.

Beth began to slow her walking just as he did, both of them noticing at the same time the trees starting to thin out on either side of them. Beth took up her position beside him and she looked up at him expectantly for instructions, immediately adapting her tread so it was barely audible like his. He couldn't help his chest warm with pride at how well she had become adapted to this life. With a short sharp tilt of his head, they both shifted their course slightly, now treading cautiously off the path and into the woods as they came up to the clearing.

Crouching down among the undergrowth close to the treeline, they both peered over the bushes at a small, tin-roof church with a few haphazard old gravestones to the right accompanied by some walkers milling around, with the whole yard surrounded by a shoulder height wire fence. Beth thought about how it looked like a cliche scene from a horror film, only the dead in today's world hadn't risen out of old graves but out of friends, family and neighbours instead.

She shivered slightly at the thought before feeling Daryl's warm hand on her shoulder, catching her attention as he crouched in front of her. Again, this was another thing that had changed. Daryl was still Daryl in that he took everything way too seriously and he wasn't touchy feely, but he didn't think twice now about giving her a nudge or tugging lightly on her ponytail when he was trying to get her attention. Beth sometimes wondered what the rest of the group would think if they could see how in tune they'd become with each other. Daryl used to be a lone wolf and she, the weakest member of the group, but now they'd become a team, depending on each other to survive.

"What d'you see?" He said in a low, gravelly voice, looking directly at her instead of the scene beside them. He did this all the time now, letting her lead; getting her to give her opinion of the situation first before asking her what she thinks they should do next.

She stretched her neck up to give the scene one last look before crouching low again to face him. "Five walkers - looks like the fence is high enough so they've been stuck there since they turned. Could also keep other walkers out although obviously wouldn't hold back a herd. No clear damage to the church so could be weather proof and while I can't see from here, I reckon it'll just be a window, not a door that backs onto the woods out the back. Easy for us to get out, not easy for someone else to get in unless we hear 'em. The path from the road was difficult to spot, so I don't think anyone'll stumble across it and we can even set game traps nearby in the woods."

She looked at him and paused for a moment, while he stared back at her expectantly, waiting for her to say more. She hesitated before continuing, "I think we should follow the treeline round the back and check in the window for people, before taking out the walkers in the yard. No point in wastin' energy on five walkers if the building's already occupied."

He smirked at her and before she had a chance to interpret what that meant, he stood suddenly, started walking silently round the treeline and looked back impatiently at her when she didn't immediately follow. She rolled her eyes and muttered, "ass" under her breath but just loud enough for him to hear before following him.

Having been with him on the road for so long now, she knew just from his posture when Daryl sensed real danger, or when he felt there was no threat but was still on guard. Today was the latter; he walked silently on his feet, holding his crossbow aimed and ready as he crept towards the window but she knew from the lack of tension in his body that he wasn't expecting to find people inside. She felt the same; as soon as she saw the walkers within the yard she guessed, like she imagined Daryl had too, that any people camping out in the church would have taken them out.

Beth noticed that the fence went around the front and two sides of the church, but joined the building on either side, leaving the back exposed. While she didn't like it, it meant Daryl could peer in the glass and if there was a threat, they could make a quick exit without being penned in by a fence. While she covered him by keeping watch in the woods, she saw him out of the corner of her eye stand on his tiptoes to look carefully into the high window before lowering his crossbow and turning to her. He shook his head, before tilting it towards the walkers to the side of the church who still hadn't noticed their arrival.

Now facing him with her full attention, he pointed at her and held up three fingers before holding one finger onto the palm of his other hand, telling her in the sign language they'd created that she should go first to take three of them out. He pointed to make it clear that he thought he didn't think they needed to enter the yard, effectively picking them off from over the fence.

With the fence keeping them safe and only five walkers to tackle, Beth didn't bother to wait for him to tell her the rest of the plan and started to walk round the outer perimeter of the fence, dragging her knife along it as she went with no need to be quiet anymore.

As expected, the walkers responded immediately to the noise, and started stumbling towards her. She looked impatiently at their grotesque features and thought idly back to the time when killing them used to bother her and how the thought of five, on the other side of a fence, used to terrify her.

Just as the first one got close to her and she held out her knife ready, a bolt shot right through his head, splattering her jumper with blood.

"Daryl!" she cried furiously and spun around to face him. Having clearly also decided that walkers behind a fence weren't a threat, he had his crossbow raised and was smirking down the sight line as he took the next one out.

With this one even closer than the last, neither Daryl or Beth were expecting that the force of Daryl's bolt would cause a large piece flesh to explode from the walker's head, smacking Beth directly on the side of her face with a decidedly loud squelch.

Daryl lowered the crossbow slightly and locked eyes with her, eyes widening in shock as he realised he may have taken it a little too far. He continued to stare, eyes still wide, as she felt the piece of flesh slide slowly down her face and drop the floor with a final, loud splat. It didn't go unnoticed by Beth that his initial look of horror was disappearing and he was doing his very best to stop the grin that was appearing on his face.

After holding his gaze for a second longer still processing what just happened, Beth turned away from him, stabbing the final three walkers in the head in quick and purposeful succession and with a lot more ferocity than necessary.

As she leaned over with her hands on her knees to catch her breath, Daryl's boots appeared in her sight line and she stood up to face him. Hands on her hips and standing up straight to yell at him, her curses died in her throat when she saw how he was looking at her, still with the ghost of that goddamn smirk on his face, but with a look of uncertainty as he held out his rag for her to wipe her face.

She snatched it from him, still mad and turned away from him.

"Huntin' jacket." He said quietly. Beth immediately turned back to face him and couldn't help her eyes lighting up willing him to continue. "I had a huntin' jacket that I wore all the time. It was warm and soft sheepskin. Merle gave it t'me. Probably lifted from somewhere. Made me forget the seasons, even when I was out in the woods and there were nothin' but snow."

She smiled widely at him and the picture in her mind. This was why she played these games. These small little snippets of Daryl that he gave away so rarely helped her build a bigger picture of the man she'd been spending every second with the past year and every time, they made her warm to her companion even more.

In step with each other, they started walking towards the door of the church. "Rain boots… did you ever wear rain boots?" she asked excitedly. And just like that, all was forgiven.


	2. Chapter 2

Later that night, satisfied from a decent meal and with camp set up in the back office of the church, Daryl sat down to take first watch while Beth settled herself for sleep. They had been right about the church; other than a few walkers whose bodies were now outside on the front porch, the building was empty.

The small office at the back contained the high up window that backed on to the woods, so on Daryl's advice, they set up sleeping and watch arrangements so they'd be directly under it. This way, if anyone looked in they wouldn't spot them, but Daryl and Beth would be immediately alerted to anyone trying to climb in and could head out the front and vice versa.

Daryl sat with his back against the wall, hands rested on his knees with Beth curled up beside him, her head pressed gently against his thigh. This was how they went to sleep every night now, before switching places as Beth took over from watch. At first, he had tensed up at the contact, feeling as if her head was burning into his leg and making him feel like he couldn't move a muscle. Gradually, he got used to it and once he started doing the same position when it was his turn to sleep, he understood the comfort that could come from knowing someone was right there when you slept.

A few months back, after a close call with a large group of walkers in a shopping mall, Daryl had found himself gently stroking Beth's hair as she tried to sleep, thwart with nightmares of what could have happened. Since then, he'd made a habit of it and Beth didn't seem to mind one bit. He knew this wasn't like him, this openness to human contact, but Beth brought it out in him and with just her left in his world, he'd adapted to what he felt she needed to survive.

"You think we can train again tomorrow?" Beth broke through his thoughts with her quiet and sleepy question.

"I 'unno Ms Greene. You think you're up to it?" He asked playfully and heard her snort softly in response.

"Daryl, soon I'm going to be kicking your ass to the floor." She replied getting a quiet huff from him.

Ever since the incident with the man back in the winter, Beth had asked Daryl to train her in self-defence. He was already angry with himself at the time for being so desperate from the cold that he put her in that situation, so he took her request as proof that she didn't think he was capable of protecting them both. He remembered frowning but nodding slightly, not wanting to deny her something she'd ask for when she so rarely asked for anything. But Beth could read him like a book even then and later that night by the fire, had just come out and called him out on it.

"I don't want you to train me because I don't think you can protect me. I know you can and I know you will Daryl. I just need to feel less useless. Know I can look after myself and contribute to our partnership whenever I need to." He remembered just staring intensely at her for a moment and couldn't help but think about how good it felt to be part of a 'partnership'.

Since then, he'd shown her how to throw punches, how to properly use her knife and more recently, had been teaching her how to escape if someone tried to grab her. He was reluctant to start this part of the training because he felt like doing so was admitting that this was even a possibility. The thought of someone trying to grab her made his fists clench together. Over time, he'd realised Beth was more than capable of looking after herself, but he couldn't help feeling fiercely protective over her.

There was a time, not too long after the fall of the prison, when he and Beth had first started to become more than just two people surviving together and they'd stayed in a funeral home they'd found. He knew something wasn't right but was stupidly distracted by how he felt like he was really seeing her for the first time that night. Luckily, at the sound of a car door slam, they'd hid in a cupboard until the men eventually left, all the while listening to them talking about people they'd captured in the 'traps' like that one they'd set up around the state. He wasn't stupid; he knew there'd be people out there who'd take advantage of the new world, but he'd be damned if he let Beth ever get close enough to them.

Even so, he'd agreed to train her and been impressed by how committed she'd been to learning and how hard she'd worked. What he'd been struggling with the last few weeks, is how he'd been finding it more and more distracting getting so physically close to her, particularly in the searing heat. Most of their sessions had involved him grabbing hold of her and her trying to escape him and her wriggling and pressing against him was making his head cloud up. He wasn't stupid; he knew Beth was attractive and she was much more to him now than just some girl he got out with. But she was also pure and good and didn't need someone who's there to protect her take advantage of her.

That's why he put these thoughts away, locked in a box in his mind that he tried not to stray to too often.

He sighed and dropped his head back against the wall, running his hand gently over her head as he listened to her soft breaths as she slept.

Daryl had woken to the church doors open with Beth sitting at the entrance watching the rain as it clattered loudly on the tin roof. She hadn't realised he was awake yet and he took the chance to watch her as she stared up at the rain falling. As he did, his mind wandered to what the weather would mean for their hunting chances that day and whether it'd be a good idea to go out training in the rain when they had shelter for once.

Beth must have sensed that he was awake and spun around where she was sitting. Satisfied he was up, she stood and stepped out into the rain cheerfully calling, "Gotta take a piss!" over her shoulder. He snorted at her cursing and propped himself up on his elbows and watched her walk out.

Beth hopped down the church steps hearing Daryl call, "Watch your fuckin' mouth Greene!" after her and she smirked as she found a private spot behind a large gravestone to relief herself.

Crouching down to do her business, a large possum suddenly appeared in front of her and before it even had a chance to realise she was there, she grabbed her knife from her holster and threw it in one swift motion, hitting the side of the creature with a short thunk. She beamed at it's body and resisted the urge to squeal in delight before she hopped up and walked happily up the church stairs swinging it by its tail as she did.

Daryl was already up and in Daryl mode, standing with his crossbow on his back and the map they found a few weeks back spread out on the table as he leaned over it engrossed in trying to work out where they were.

"Got us a redneck breakfast!" she called happily and he glanced up distractedly and quirked a smile at her soaked appearance before going back to the map.

"Yes ma'am you did." He murmured absently, frowning in concentration as he traced his fingers along the map.

Beth knew when he was in business mode and that he'd tell her what he was thinking when he was ready, so she set about packing up their stuff. Even if they were planning on staying a little while longer, they always packed up everything each day so if they needed to run, they were ready.

Not too long ago they'd found an old RV and thought it might just be safe enough to stay for a while. They were still careful, sleeping only in the tiny bathroom with the window to the roof above them, but had been stupid and, after a week of being there, had got confident enough to leave their food supply in the kitchen area. It was only the second week when they'd woken to a stream of walkers pushing through the front door and had only managed to escape through the rooflight in the nick of time. Daryl spoke in only grunts for a good few days after that, furious and angry with himself for letting them get comfortable enough to lose all their food.

"Thinkin' we could hole up here for a while. Far enough from anythin' else and looks like there's a stream just two miles North of here." Daryl broke through her thoughts with his assessment of their location and Beth smiled warmly at him.

"Alright then. So what is it today, trackin' or trainin'?" She asked him brightly, hoping he'd say the latter.

Even though it was a serious task, for a serious reason, Beth loved training with Daryl; seeing him suddenly become all business when he was effectively just chasing her around. He was impressive too, a born survivor he seemed to know everything about how to fight and how to second guess your opponent. But most of all, she'd gotten to enjoy the feeling of his strong arms around her and sometimes had to remind herself that she was meant to be trying to get away. She hadn't thought a lot on why she had started to enjoy this so much, only that she'd become so close to Daryl now that it was nice to have some time in the day when the focus wasn't on the food, or the shelter, or the walkers - but just on eachother.

"Well, since you've already bagged us breakfast and lunch G.I. Greene I'd say it's a kickin' your ass kinda day." He drawled, bumping her shoulder as he walked past her and lifted one end of the first pew. She was momentarily distracted by the flex in his arm muscles as he did it before he called, "You gonna give me a hand or what?" His eyes were looking intently and quizzically at her face and she had a horrible sense that he knew exactly what she'd just been staring at.

"So we practicing in here today then?" She asked, grabbing the other end of the pew and helping him lift it to the side.

"Yep." He answered, offering no further explanation as he walked to the next one.

Within twenty minutes a large space in the church was cleared and the rain continued to hammer persistently on the tin roof.

"OK, come on, hit me Daryl." She bounced excitedly from foot to foot in the middle of the church. There was already a trickle of sweat running down the side of her face from the humidity of the enclosed building.

"Beth. I ain't gonna _hit_ you." He said frowning, standing in front of her, hands slightly raised and one foot forward as if waiting for her to attack.

"Come on Daryl, how you gonna train me if you don't attack me?" She whined. "OK... so try catch me again!" Before she'd even had a chance to take a step in the other direction, his reflexes were faster and he reached out and grabbed her by the arm and spun her into his grasp.

He had one arm across her waist restraining her with her back pressed against his body and the other trying to grab hold of her hand as she flailed about trying to get away.

"Come on Beth." He growled near her ear. "We done this before, how you gonna get out?" Beth struggled in his grasp, trying to pry his arm that was across her waist with her fingers.

"Come on, girl." He ground out as he struggled to keep her in his grip. "You know that ain't how to do it." He said even closer now as he struggled to keep hold of her.

Beth was trying absolutely hard to concentrate but her mind was spinning at the feel of his breath in her ear as he spoke to her over her shoulder. She was sweaty and sticky pressed against him and, while he seemed completely focussed on the task at hand, she was trying to keep her thoughts from going into overdrive. This was Daryl afterall, he was her friend, sole companion and protector; this was absolutely not the place to be having these kinds of thoughts. Obviously, she found him attractive, but he was way more than that and she had no intention to mess up or confuse the partnership they'd built in this new world.

Suddenly with a clear mind, she saw her opening and rammed an elbow as hard as possible back into his groin, leading him to immediately release her as he stepped quickly backwards with a pained grunt. She spun around and hopped backwards five or six steps, facing him smiling gleefully as he bent over with his hands on his knees.

" _Fuck_ , Beth. You did good but… _fuck_." He breathed out in pain, still bent over with his eyes scrunched shut. Her smile faltered and she took a few tentative steps forward to check he wasn't trying to trick her. When he didn't move she took a few steps closer and still nothing.

"Shit Daryl, you OK?" She asked standing beside him now with her hand on his back leaning forward to see his face. Before she had a chance to realise what was happening, he righted himself suddenly, grabbed her by each bicep and pushed her up against the wall, with a nail digging sharply into her back. Shoving one of her feet to the side and pushing against her so he had her completely pinned, his face was close to hers so she had a full view of his arrogant smirk.

"Come on Beth, only way to get outta this one is to play dirty - what've I taught you 'bout being a dirty fighter?" he breathed, staring her in the eye as she tried to move her arms from under his grasp against the wall on either side of her.

Beth knew what he meant; a headbutt, spit or another knee to the groin were all gonna get her out of this one, but listening to his gravelly voice and feeling him pressed against her, she suddenly felt a heat spreading through her and felt completely overwhelmed by their position.

Ever since they'd started the hand to hand training a few weeks back, this feeling had been emerging, but normally she could mentally tell herself to shut up and get back to the business at hand. It was a feeling of being totally consumed by Daryl; the smell of him, the warmth of his body pressed up against her and, if she didn't catch her thoughts quick enough, the sight of him; with his hair slick with sweat against his face, lips slightly parted with exertion and his intense serious eyes on her.

Before she even realised what she was doing, in a total reflexive reaction to her thoughts, she pushed herself against him, shifting her hips forward and up which, in the position they were in, meant they connected with his, with her centre brushing against his thigh that was in between her legs. She couldn't help the slight moan that escaped her lips as she did so.

She heard Daryl's sudden intake of breath and he seemed to react instantly, releasing her arms and grabbing either side of her hips and pushing her hard back against the wall away from him. He hadn't moved his face from hers and his expression darkened, his eyes burning intensely as he stared at her, hands now holding tightly to her hips to keep them away from his. He was so close to her she could feel his breath on her face and she had a sudden and crazy urge to lean forward and kiss him. His fingernails digging into her hips as he held her in place made her think he could almost read her mind. Without another second, he released her as if her skin burned him, stepped back abruptly and turned suddenly without a glance at her before marching towards the church door, grabbing his crossbow as he did.

"Daryl, I-"

"Taking a piss!" He interrupted her, repeating her words from the morning as he strode out the door without looking back.


	3. Chapter 3

Beth stood there and thought she could literally slap herself. She had no idea what the hell just happened. She couldn't believe she literally thrust herself at Daryl and sent him running for the door. This was not good at all. They were partners; they ate together, hunted together, hell, went to the toilet together - she was not going to screw this up because she was being a frustrated teenager. Because that must be all it is. Daryl was a good man; the best in fact and she absolutely trusted him with her life. She couldn't imagine ever being apart from him now and the thought of it made her ache. Even so, this didn't mean anything more than just that and she needed to stop any stupid thoughts right now. She sighed loudly and told herself to put it away.

Daryl walked silently through the woods, crossbow in hand wondering what the _fuck_ had just happened. She had been hot and slick and moving against him and he had been trying with everything in his power to just _think_ about training her and not about how amazing her body felt. He could feel her soft skin through her clothes and she was so warm and the smell of her was all around him and when he pushed one of her legs to the side he almost lost his _mind_ at the thought of what would happen if he moved his hips just slightly closer. And while he was battling to keep his grip on his sanity, she had gone and done that. He had to grab her and push her back before he completely lost it and thrust himself hard against her and _why the fuck_ was he even thinking that. What if she hadn't even meant to do it? Meant absolutely nothing by it and his mind had gone into goddamn overdrive over some insignificant movement.

He welcomed the familiar sound of rustling and groaning and waited for the three walkers to come close enough to him before taking each of them out with his knife. The adrenalin did nothing to release his pent up tension and he rubbed a hand down his face and groaned as he thought about his predicament. Over the last year, he'd got so used to having Beth as the only other person in the world, he felt like he could easily predict her every move. They'd almost become one entity; they could communicate without speaking and he could feel her mood as soon as he'd wake up. So why had he not seen this coming? Whatever the hell happened today, he was not going to let himself think there was any possibility that there would be anything more here than them being the partners that they'd become. He would put whatever stupid thoughts he was having away and lock them right up. Still unable to clear his head, he set off to check out the area woods that they'd made home.

By the time he got back, he was still feeling unsure and nervous but had calmed down his panic from earlier. Even so, it'd been a lot longer than a piss as he'd said, and he hoped she wasn't gonna be mad that he'd been gone so long. He'd caught four squirrels for dinner and noted as he walked up the steps that she'd set up noise alarms around both the fence and the church itself. She heard him coming and he was pleased she had her hand on her knife when he opened the door. Suddenly overwhelmed by the memory of what happened between them earlier he averted his eyes as soon as she looked at him and muttered, "Got dinner," before dumping his crossbow by the door. He paused before hesitantly and quietly adding, "Seen you set up the alarms. Did a good job." He still wouldn't look at her as he set the squirrels down.

Beth didn't say anything for a moment and looked at him as if she was trying to read him. "Yeah, thought it'd be a good idea. After you left, about nine of 'em showed up at the back of the church. Wonder whether it was the rain on the roof that drew 'em over. I took care of 'em though." She said quietly still looking at him.

"You went outside the fence? And took on nine on your own?" Daryl asked, staring at her now all embarrassment forgotten.

"Yep, I didn't want them to draw others over and you weren't around." She answered defensively already seeing where this was going.

"You know the rule Beth. Three. Three when it's just one of us on our own. Anythin' more'n we wait for the other one or if we can't, we run." He growled, angry now.

"We gotta good spot here Daryl. Wasn't gonna run and I could take 'em fine." Beth lied. She couldn't take them fine, in fact, it had been a close call and she had only just stopped shaking from the shock of it by the time Daryl had got back.

"Ain't worth it Beth. Just the two of us here now. That's why we made the rule. Ain't worth it." He said softly, looking at her now as if he could see right into her soul and see the truth.

She walked over to him and he followed her movements with his eyes as she stopped in front of him and gently touched his arm.

"I know Daryl. Was stupid. But I ain't going anywhere." She said quietly while looking up at him. He looked back, before nodding slightly and turning away from her to go start fixing dinner.

Her heart ached for the hurt and fear she'd seen cross his face before he quickly schooled his features. She suddenly felt disappointed with herself for being so stupid. They were all eachother had so really, risking her own life was risking both of theirs. No matter how much Daryl was a survivor, she didn't think anyone could really survive in this world on their own. She felt a surge of affection and protectiveness at the thought of him being alone. She wouldn't let them happen and she made a mental pact she'd be more careful.

After Beth counted fourteen sunrises since they first found the church, she sent a thanks up to God that they'd managed to stay in one place for a whole two weeks without any problems. They'd hunted well together, kept well fed and made the church more secure and she'd even started to let herself think that this could just be the break they needed ahead of the winter coming.

Daryl had even made the yard smaller, using the fence panels he took out to reinforce the back of the church and put noisemakers around the top of the whole thing, so nobody would be able to climb over it without them knowing about it.

On day eight they'd gone on a run to a cabin they found four miles from the church and come back with blankets, cans of food and a first aid kit and Beth couldn't help signing that night with her spirits so high.

Daryl felt like their lucky streak would never end, as he tucked into the last of the turkey that they'd caught earlier. Beth had used some of tinned peas and it felt like a real meal.

Despite all their good fortune, on this particular night Beth was quiet and Daryl had noticed. He hated it when she went quiet like this. He was never any good at starting conversation and if she wasn't so chatty, he wondered whether they'd talk at all. So when she went quiet like this, he never knew what to say.

Sitting with the fire going and their bellies full of good food, Daryl stared at Beth as she stared into the fire. They had set up in a corner of the main church and the light from the flames danced across the walls.

"When I was little, my Ma would try and take us to church now and then." He started quietly and looked away as soon as Beth looked up at him. "Was one of those things where she'd try get us all cleaned up, lookin' like respectable little rednecks. My pa hated church and used to say that the people who went were fools." He paused and looked over to see he had her full attention before continuing.

"Maybe they were. And when I used to go I used to feel judged by not just 'God' if he's even up there, but everyone else in there too. Used to hate it when Ma made us go." He paused again and Beth continued to look at him expectantly, waiting for him to go on. "Dunno whether she knew somethin' bad was gonna happen to her eventually or what and maybe that's why she made us go, but after she died, the church people were good to us. Used to come round with food and make sure we were OK. Even with my Pa yelling at them and throwing it back at them, most of them still kept comin', try'na make sure we were doing alright." He said thoughtfully, looking down at his knife as he sharpened it.

"Did it make you believe there was a God?" Beth asked quietly, with her knees drawn up to her chest as she sat on the floor near the fire.

"Dunno. At the time I was so mad with Ma for what happened, I didn't see that they were being good. Thought maybe they were just doin' it to feel good about themselves. Didn't really care much about worthless kids like us." He averted his eyes away from her as he finished quietly.

"Daryl, you weren't worthless then and you aren't worthless now. You went through hell when you were a kid and yet it's made you who you are today. Whether or not you believe in God, I know he's proud of what you've become." She said quietly but confidently, looking at him directly in the eye.

He looked back at her willing himself to believe her. He'd shared so much of his past with her now, including what his Dad was like, what happened to his Ma and the parts of his life he wasn't proud of and yet she still seemed to believe in him. He looked at her intently as the fire flickered across her features and he could see the sadness in her tonight that he'd felt earlier.

"You doing OK, Beth?" He asked softly while continuing to look at her. She was quiet for a while, looking into the fire before she answered.

"Just miss 'em all you know? When we have lucky breaks like I feel we've had lately, I just wonder if they're OK. Whether we're taking all the good luck for ourselves, you know?" She asked, looking at him for an answer.

"Yeah I know." He said quietly, absently fiddling with his knife. "They're tough Beth. Hell, maybe they even got a luckier break than us." He said and she smiled softly at him. It wasn't like him to say anything too hopeful like this and she knew he was doing it for her benefit.

"C'mon, it's gettin' late." He said and stood, stamping out the fire, before holding out a hand to pull her up. She smiled and took it and led the way to the back office where they'd set up their sleeping stuff under the window.

As he sat down to take first watch, instead of lying down like usual, she sat with her back against the wall like he did and rested her head on his shoulder. She smiled softly as she felt the pressure of his head leaning on top of hers.

Daryl breathed in as his senses were filled with the smell of her hair. He stared ahead thinking about the others and what they'd all think if they saw them like this now. The last time they saw them, him and Beth were nothing to each other. He can't even remember what he thought of her. Now, she was everything to him and he wondered what they'd all make of that. He was an asshole a lot of the time yet she seemed to care for him. But she was good like that; she cared for everyone and believed in everyone. The way she believed in him made him want to try and want to make their world an easier place to live. As his thoughts were filled with Beth, he felt himself starting to drift off and absently decided that they'd reinforced this place enough for them to sleep at the same time.


	4. Chapter 4

Still both sitting in the same position they fell asleep in, Daryl woke up with a jolt to the sound of the noisemakers clanging and within in a beat, had jumped up and grabbed his crossbow. He noted immediately it was pitch black outside so must be in the middle of the night. The sudden movement had jostled Beth awake and she sat up straight, looking up at his back as he stood at the office door, with his crossbow raised, tension through the lines of his body.

He sensed she was awake immediately and turned to look at her and gave her a sharp nod. She nodded back before he turned back facing the door, all the while the noise makers clanging loudly and persistently. Moving quickly and silently she gathered all of their belongings and packed their bags ready to go. Neither of them needed to get dressed or put their boots on; they always slept ready to run.

As soon as he sensed she was ready and behind him with her knife, he cracked the office door open slightly, only to be assaulted by the overpowering smell and noise of the dead. Whatever they thought of their reinforcements, if a herd came through, nothing would stop them from coming and it seemed their good luck was up. There must have been hundreds of them who'd already broken through through the fences and were currently streaming through the front door of the church.

" _Shit_." Daryl cursed loudly and while holding the handle of the door tightly, he started looking around frantically for someway to get out.

"Window Beth, now." He said and she ran to the back of the room and stood on her tiptoes to peer out.

"Daryl, they're there too." She said, panic rising in her voice.

"Mother _fuck_." Daryl said, the extent of their situation becoming apparent. He had no idea how to get out of this on ne. Once the walkers hit the door, he wouldn't be able to hold them off for long and their haven had now become their prison, trapped inside with walkers all around.

"What the fuck are you doing Beth?" Daryl cursed, his knuckles turning white as he held to door tighter as the banging began on the other side.

Beth was running round the small office, pushing furniture out the way and flinging anything she could get her hands on around the room.

"It's just… I know… in a lot of old churches… GOT IT!" She exclaimed excitedly, as she looked down at something on the ground where the desk had been moments before. Right there in front of her, Beth found a small metal latch, which she pulled, opening up a long, rectangular trap door. Barely deep enough to fit a person, but long enough to accommodate someone lying down, it reminded Daryl eerily of the coffin in the funeral home, but this one would be perfect for keeping the dead out.

"You're a fucking genius you know that girl?" Daryl said, as he let go of the door, grabbing Beth and helping her into the space, just as he heard the sound of splintering wood.

Beth shoved their packs at the one end and quickly lay down with her head on her pack, shifting herself to the side with her back against one side so Daryl could get in after her. He hopped in, put his crossbow at their feet and lay down facing her, his back against the other wall before quickly slamming the trap door down, just as they heard the crash as the walkers broke into the office.

As they heard what sounded like hundreds of bodies above them, Beth tried to control her breathing in the tiny and pitch back enclosed space. She knew she was facing Daryl although she couldn't see him. Because of the tightness of the space, his whole body was pressed up against hers, although she could tell from the tension of his muscles he was holding himself still and as far away from her as possible.

As she listened to them thundering above her, she shut her eyes and tried everything she could to stop the feeling of panic in her chest and her erratic breathing.

"You're alright Beth." She heard Daryl whisper in the darkness and she opened her eyes, willing them to adjust so she could see him. "Just take deep breaths. You're alright."

She wanted to feel him to know he was there and moved her arm forward, placing her hand on what she felt was his chest. She felt his familiar leather vest and grabbed hold of it in her fist, holding on as if her life depended on it.

She heard rustling as Daryl adjusted himself and suddenly felt a hand gently lifting her head. She felt a sudden warmth as he lifted his arm up and over her head, using his other hand to lower her head back on to it. His arm curled around her shoulders as he tried to comfort her.

She could feel from his breaths on her face that he was right there in front of her and before she could stop herself, she reached up and traced her finger along his cheek. She heard him take an intake of breath at her touch. She tried desperately to see in the dark to read his expression, but right now, she was just content with knowing he was right there with her. Listening to the deafening noise of groaning and movement above her, she closed her eyes and desperately tried to shut it all out.


	5. Chapter 5

At some point, with his arm round her and her hand resting on his chest, they both must have fallen asleep because when Beth awoke, she realised without Daryl holding himself against the wall, he had sunk forwards and their legs had become knotted together. She noticed with relief that the deafening noise of the walkers above her was now reduced to a few isolated clunking and scraping noises.

While still dark in the crawl space, the daylight outside meant Beth could just about see around her and was able to see that Daryl was still asleep. It was unlike Daryl not to wake as soon as she did and right now his face was just inches from hers. She stared at him for a second, taking in his relaxed features that she rarely got to see, before taking a moment to relish in the feeling of having him all around her, feeling the warmth and hard lines of his body against her.

She looked down towards their feet and tried to make sense of the strange warm feeling that spread through her at the sight of their bodies so entangled.

Their legs were completely overlapping, their hips were close together and their chests were close, with her hand between them still clinging to his vest. Mostly, she stared and his hand, which rested lightly on her hip, while his other arm formed the pillow she was resting her head on.

Without thinking, she released his vest and covered his hand on her hip with her own. Watching closely, with a featherlight touch, she ran her hand slowly up his arm, tracing the lines of his muscles until she was tracing the lines of his bicep, before sliding it slowly and gently down again.

She felt his fingers on her hip flex slightly and she glanced up to see his eyes were open and he was staring at her face intently. She didn't say anything, instead staring back at him with their face inches from his. She looked back down again between them and repeated her action, running her hand up and down his arm again, watching the goosebumps appear on his skin as she went.

She wasn't quite sure what she was doing but she knew she was straying into new territory and felt like she was on the edge of something. She kept repeating her actions slowly and felt herself blushing as she could feel his eyes on her face. She chanced a glance up at him and while she couldn't read his expression, she felt hot under the burning intensity of his stare.

She looked back down again and this time, put her hand under his arm on his side. She felt the rigidity of his toned muscles there and felt her skin warm up again at the thought of his body underneath. She'd seen him without a shirt countless times now though; they'd long worked through his scars and what they meant and he'd started to feel comfortable when they'd take it in turns to bathe and keep watch.

But now, as she felt his hard torso underneath her hand, the thought of his body had a whole new meaning and she felt a new desire creeping over her body. Under the burning intensity of his gaze, she slowly slid her hand down his side, down so it rested on his hips like his did on hers, before she slowly slid it back up his body again. Again, she slid it down his side, felt his belt and jeans as she reached his hip, before sliding back up again. She heard his breath hitch and and she felt her heart hammering in her chest. Still not looking at him, she brought her hand back round to where it had been before between them, so that it rested on the centre of his chest.

Staring intently at it, she begun to move it slowly down the front of his body not letting herself think clearly about what she was doing or where she was going with this. She felt the buttons of his shirt under her touch as she went. As she got lower and her hand grazed the top of his belt buckle, she felt his fingers digging into her hip, before he suddenly let go and grabbed her hand in his.

" _Beth_." He breathed, with a warning but pained tone. As if she suddenly realised he was there, she looked up at his face and blushed at his expression. He was looking at her with the most darkened and intense eyes, staring into hers. What struck her though was the pleading look in them that had her second guessing herself.

"Beth." He breathed again, softer this time and she couldn't get a grip on what was happening or the feeling like something was shifting between them. She knew she wanted to do _something_ and the heat she felt at her core was making it difficult to think about anything other than how she wanted to touch him more.

But this was Daryl and she felt she was already dangerously close to some kind of line that the pleading in his eyes told her to be careful of.

Before she had a chance to work out what her next move was, there was a loud crash above them of something falling onto the floor which shook them both out of the moment. They listened carefully and the isolated dragging sound now seemed to be becoming more and more distant.

Daryl looked back down at her, still with an intense but unreadable look on his face, before he looked further down, this time at the crossbow at his feet. Beth got his intention straight away and shifted with her back right against the wall, de-tangling their legs so he could reach it.

With no clear noise above them apart from a distant dragging, Daryl had clearly decided now was the time to move and was shifting his legs to maneuver his crossbow towards his hands, while Beth got her knife ready. He glanced down at her again and held his finger to his lips, before looking up to quietly push the trap door open. As he climbed out with stealth and agility that only Daryl could master, he turned and mouthed, _stay_ , at her, before turning with his crossbow raised, head tilted into the sight line and walked silently out the broken office door.

Whatever the hell just happened between them, she wasn't going to let him go out and face whatever was waiting for them on his own in order to keep her safe. She held her knife tightly and followed him out there.

She was momentarily distracted by the destruction in the empty church, before she went out the front to see Daryl standing in the yard shooting a bolt into the last walker.

"Herd must'a passed through." He muttered more to himself than her as he surveyed the damage around them. He turned and looked up to her on the steps as she looked round at the busted church door and the fences, all but one destroyed.

"Looks like we're moving on too I guess?" She looked sadly down at him, feeling miserable that the bubble they'd created had popped so suddenly.

"Guess so."


	6. Chapter 6

The next evening, after spending a solid day on the move finding food but no shelter, they'd pitched their tent by a stream. Daryl sat with his back against a tree facing Beth, as she sat at the entrance to the tent trying to stitch up a hole in his spare shirt.

Beth thought absently about how the sewing kit was a good find, but they were gonna run out of thread soon and once they did, they'd need to find more, or some new clothes at least.

She glanced up at Daryl and smiled softly at him, to which he quirked a small smile in response. Beth had been worried that Daryl would have freaked out at whatever had overcome her in the crawl space and done his usual Daryl response and run. Luckily, he would always put their safety first, so seemed to have spent the day focussed on finding food and shelter above all else. Having met half these objectives already, he was in higher than usual spirits.

Sensing his positive mood, she put down her sewing, chucked a bottle of water at him and looked at him patiently. As he took a swing, his eyes narrowed, immediately sensing something was coming.

"I wanna talk about girls." She said confidently at him and he spluttered on the water.

"Huh. Now if I was a bettin' man I wouldn'a put money on you swingin' that way." He teased with a smirk. Beth rolled her eyes in response.

"No Daryl, _I_ don't wanna talk about girls, I want _you_ to talk about girls."

He huffed in frustration and watched himself dig at a rock in the ground with his knife.

"Ain't happenin'." He responded.

"Oh come on Daryl! I know everything about you now! I know everything about where you grew up, I know your favourite food, favourite tv shows, I've seen your lily white ass when you've washed… come on! Why's this anything special?" She looked at him evenly, holding his gaze.

He stopped fiddling with his knife and stared back at her with an unreadable expression.

He continued to stare for a second longer, looking as if he was trying to figure something out before he replied.

"Alright. What you wanna know?"

She grinned, pleased she'd got her own way, as she thought carefully about her question.

"You done it?"

He groaned. "You serious? Is that how you're gonna ask me that? How old're you again?" He asked with a look of exasperation.

"Come onnn." She whined. "I just wanna know! _Have...you...had...sex...before?_ " She pronounced her question with an emphasis on each separate word.

"Yes Beth - _I...have...had...sex...before_." He replied, mirroring her emphasis with his answer, while looking intently again at the rock he was digging out with his knife. She grinned, feeling smug that she was getting somewhere with her latest line of questioning.

"Ooh OK. Wasit good?" She asked.

"Any particular occasion you askin' me about?" He asked with a patronising lilt to his voice. She raised her eyebrows.

"I dunno. Any particular time you wanna tell me about?" She asked excitedly. He stared up at her.

"Where you goin' with this, girl?" He asked, becoming impatient with the game.

She felt her smile falter at his lack of enthusiasm. "I just want to know what it's like." She grumbled, now picking up the sewing again. "I ticked off all the other bases with both Zach and Jimmy, but never went all the way."

"Ooh Beth!" He groaned, tilting his head back against the tree and covering his eyes with his hands. "Just 'cause we got a tent, I ain't one of your girlfriends on a camping trip. S'way more'n I wanna know."

She felt her face burn up in embarrassment and her mood sour at the turn the conversation had taken.

"Daryl, in case you ain't noticed, there ain't noone else around to talk to! All the girlfriends I'd talk to about this kinda stuff are probably dead. So yeah, if I wanna pick your brains on what it's like, maybe you should just stop being such a baby and humour me." She asked with an air of finality before looking back at her sewing.

She knew name calling would get her nowhere with Daryl but she couldn't help it. She meant what she said, she was curious to know and since there was noone else to ask, she had no other choice. She imagined Daryl would have a lot of experience that he'd able to tell her about, but she guessed she was being a little too hopeful thinking he'd actually wanna talk about it. This was Daryl after all.

She had gone quiet, accepting that was the end of the conversation and was starting to feel more than a little stupid for starting it in the first place. Going back to her sewing, she could feel his eyes on her as if he was trying to decide something.

While Daryl couldn't think of anything worse to be talking about out here with Beth, she had a point. He sometimes forgot that there was probably plenty of stuff the turn of the world had stopped her doing and Beth being Beth, she had just got on with it. She was strong and very rarely asked him for anything, so he suddenly felt wrong about denying her an honest answer.

"Been with plenty a'girls but it don't really count if it don't mean nothin'." He said very quietly, looking thoughtfully at her. "Should be somethin' you wanna do with someone you wanna do it with Beth."

She looked at him for a moment, before nodding and turning back to her sewing.

After a few minutes of silence he felt her look up at him. "So pleeentty of girls huh?!" She asked with a devilish grin.

"Oh _shut up_." He threw the bottle of water at her as she burst into giggles before he let his head fall back against the tree and shut his eyes in exasperation.


	7. Chapter 7

Daryl was not in a talking mood today. Four weeks he'd counted since the herd came through the church. And four weeks of being back on the move, going from one shitty place to the next. They'd stayed in a few abandoned cars, their tent, a kid's den in the woods and a few dilapidated cabins and were now just starting to run out of supplies.

He wanted to stay away from buildings that were a part of any towns, but he also knew they were low on supplies and the nights were getting colder. He knew he was being stubborn but he was insisting they stick to the woods, wandering aimlessly in the unrealistic hope they'd stumble across a decent and well stocked building.

Beth could sense his mood but was getting more and more frustrated with him. For a long while they'd made decisions as a partnership and it was driving her crazy that the few times she'd suggested they found a town, he'd grunted his dismissal and kept ignoring her. He was back to being crappy, surly Daryl and she'd had enough.

"Ergh, that's it!" She suddenly stepped forward and rounded on him, effectively blocking his path. He stopped immediately and his eyes narrowed at her.

"Since when did you get t'decide everything we do, huh? I more than shown I'm part of this team so when did I stop having a say in it? You're being an _ass_ Daryl and I'm getting stick of it!" She prodded him hard in the chest with her finger on the word 'ass'.

His eyes narrowed even further. "What you wanna do Beth? Catch up with that herd in a town? Or have a little girly camping trip under the stars all exposed? Which is it? 'Coz I'm tryn'a find us somewhere which means we don't have to do neither!"

"Which is it?! Daryl, walking around these woods like a pair'a walkers ain't gonna fix anythin'! I say we head into t'nearest town, pick up some supplies because incase you ain't notice, we're low on just about everything, then I wanna find some shitty house that's better than this shitty tent and get you a good night's sleep so maybe you'll wake up tomorrow and stop being such a little _bitch_!" She yelled in his face, her cheeks red from her anger and exertion.

"I'm the little bitch?! Case you ain't notice I'm _fine_ out here, you're the one who wants to risk your sorry ass because you missin' your home comforts!" He leaned forward, his hardened face right up in hers as he yelled at her. Drawn by the noise, a walker suddenly stumbled out of the trees heading straight for them. Daryl sighed loudly and barely even glancing in it's direction, he raised his crossbow and fired a bolt right into it's head.

Suddenly, three more seemed to appear, groaning and stumbling towards them and before either of Beth or Daryl had a chance to take them out more appeared behind them.

"Too many." Beth said quietly stepping backwards.

Daryl grabbed her hand, spun her around and starting running. "Well looks like you got your wish _little miss sunshine_. Take us to the nearest town." He said sarcastically, the sourness on his face even worse.

By the time they reached a town about an hour later, Beth was in a much better mood. She'd taken Daryl's taunt as a challenge and using everything he'd taught her, had found them a town to check out and they'd shaken off the group of walkers on the way.

Neither of them were a fan of towns, having learned quickly that towns meant people and with so much time having passed since the world went to shit, towns now often also meant established territories. Despite his awful mood, Daryl was smart enough to know that if he wanted to keep them safe, he needed to be switched on and attuned to Beth and their surroundings.

As they reached the edge of the treeline, Daryl was walking stealthily with his bow raised and Beth flanking him from behind with her knife raised.

Both crouched down with Daryl slightly in front facing the houses. "What you thinking, Beth?" Daryl asked over his shoulder without looking at her.

Beth peered over at the edge of the town, looking at four backyards of houses that made up what looked like a quiet cul de sac set a little apart from the town.

"Well, normally I'd say we should never hit the nearest houses first 'cause everyone would'a done that so we'd either find no supplies or find people, but…" She paused, as she stood up slightly to try to see beyond the houses at the town in the distance. "..I think not many people would'a come this way. Streets seem to go in all directions, but this one here is a dead end and by the looks of this part'a the woods, it ain't exactly well travelled." Beth grinned at his back before continuing, "What do you think _little Mr Sunshine_?"

She saw Daryl turn his head slightly and look at her sideways through the slits of his eyes.

"I think one'a these arrows going where the sun don't shine if you call me that again." He went to stand and in doing so, placed a hand on her shoulder to push himself up, giving her a playful push as he did so.

Because of Beth's position, crouching with her hands on her knees, the push caused her to lose her balance and she fell back on her ass. Daryl stood in front of her, a pleased smirk on his face as he held out his hand to pull her up. Beth was still in a good mood from getting her way and finding the town so she took it, pulling herself up with a smirk of her own.

With crossbow raised and Beth taking her position slightly behind him, Daryl turned and set off towards the middle house.

A few hours later, Beth and Daryl sat in the loft of the third house, warm and comfortable surrounded by blankets, eating Twinkies they'd found under the bed in a little girl's room in the third house. They hadn't come across any people, had took out a family of four walkers in house number two and had decided to check out the rest of the town the following day. They chose house three so that if anyone chose to pick over the houses, they figured most people would do them in a row so they'd hear if someone hit the first one, giving them time to get out.

It was Beth's idea to camp out in the loft, having noticed the skylight from the woods. It was smart - for anyone to get up there, they'd need to open the loft hatch and pull the ladder down, at which point Beth and Daryl would be long gone via the roof. It wasn't the safest exit, but it was an exit if they needed it.

The loft was fairly small with a low ceiling, boarded up floor and old boxes full of Christmas decorations taking up most of the room. Beth and Daryl had arranged themselves by the hatch door and were sitting side by side on a big comforter with Beth wrapped up in another blanket. Daryl had his knees drawn up with his hands resting on each while Beth's legs were stretched out in front of her, her feet knocking together in contentment. She was humming softly as she took small bites out of her twinkie and Daryl couldn't help watching her out of the corner of his eye.

Eventually Beth noticed and turning her head to look at him she bumped her shoulder gently against his.

"You done being mad with now?" She asked softly.

Daryl stared back at her seriously for a second before looking back at the floor. "'Never mad at ya Beth. Just pissed off that we haven't had a break in a while."

"We got one now." She smiled softly at him. "Got away from a big bunch a'walkers. Found some twinkies. And now gotta pretty good safe house. Think we're doing pretty good."

He turned to look at her and she was smiling again and he couldn't help his mouth quirking into a smile. "Yeah guess so."

"And you know what else is good? Ain't no way anyone's getting near us without us knowing about it so no point in watch tonight. Nothing _to_ watch." She said, gesturing round to the empty loft. "We can both get a good night's sleep and be ready to check out the whole town tomorrow." She said with a small smile.

Daryl stared at her again and suddenly felt hot and bothered about laying down with her. There wasn't exactly anywhere else he could move to to sleep, so he realised she was probably expecting that he'd lie down right there next to her. He knew he was being stupid even feeling strange about that; they spent some of the last month sleeping in a tent together, but there was something about the cosiness of sleeping on a comforter with a blanket that made him overthink it.

Oblivious to his thoughts, Beth had already starting to arrange herself for bed, lying down on her back and arranging the cover over herself. Before he let his mind take him anywhere stupid, Daryl took the plunge and lay down on his back too, suddenly overwhelmed by how tired he really was.

"Night Daryl." She whispered quietly and not long after, he heard her breathing even out. As he felt himself drifting off, the last thing he remembered was wondering how he ended up having the blanket over him too


	8. Chapter 8

When Daryl woke up in the middle of the night later, he came to in a haze to a strange tickling under his nose. Inhaling deeply, his senses were completely surrounded by something that was so totally Beth. As his mind began to catch up, he sleepily opened his eyes and waited for them to adjust to the darkness around him. What he saw was the loft space as he expected, but the view was obscured by something directly in front of him, the golden thing that was tickling him.

He realised within a beat and with a shock that the golden thing was Beth's soft hair and somehow, in the night he'd managed to wrap himself around her and was now spooning her from behind. One of his arms was pillowed under her head and the other one of his large hands was splayed against her middle, holding her against him. He realised with a jolt that underneath his hand was bare skin, with her top having ridden up slightly in the night.

He was in trouble. The softness of her skin combined with the smell of her plus the warmth of her body against him sent an electrical current through his whole body. He squeezed his eyes shut as he realised his whole body down to the bend in his knees was fit along the lines of hers, including his hips which were pressed right up against her.

In a panic, he realised the overdrive to his senses was making his blood run South and he abruptly moved his hips back before his body betrayed him. Now not so pressed against her, he tried to distract himself from what was happening and took a moment to zone in on his hearing, only to hear her soft breaths that told him she was still asleep.

He didn't want to move any more for fear of waking her, so every other part of him stayed the same, including his hand that felt like it was on fire against the skin on her lean stomach. _God she was so soft_ and he needed to stop thinking that because the more he did, the harder he was becoming in his jeans.

He felt like some stupid teenager getting hard from just being near a girl and couldn't believe this was actually happening.

He was doing everything he could to get his mind to _calm the fuck down_ and to stop thinking about her against his body.

He closed his eyes and blew a calming breath out but in doing so he did the one thing that would not help his current situation. He followed his breath out with a deep breath in and as he did, he subconsciously leaned forward slightly to get the full impact of the sweet smell that he'd come to know was Beth.

He felt like a fucking creep but as soon as he did it, he was completely assaulted by the smell and feel of her and realised he was starting to lose his battle for control.

Now with his body not listening at all to his mind saying this was all wrong and what the _fuck was he doing,_ he moved his hand on her stomach back just the slightest bit and traced his fingers in a feather light touch across her stomach.

 _Fucking hell_ he couldn't deal with how soft she was and how warm her skin was and as a clear sign that he'd completely lost control, he did it again, dragging his fingers softly and slowly across her stomach just above the line of her jeans.

He was so hard now and was using all his willpower to hold his hips back and ignore the the desperate need in him to get some kind of friction because _fuck_ , he needed it and he needed her.

His thoughts were so completely engrossed by getting his body to calm the fuck down and his mind was so fascinated by the feel of that one patch of skin as he continued stroking her that it was a few seconds before he realised her slow even breathing had suddenly stopped and she seemed to be holding her breath.

His hand froze, suddenly completely aware of what an absolute fucking creep he was. What the _actual fuck_ had been thinking. Yeah he's stroked her hair while she slept, but this was not the fucking same and he suddenly became painfully aware that he'd probably completely fucked up all the trust she had in him in one stupid evening, drunk off the feel of her.

Before he had a chance to yank his hand away and run, which was exactly what he planned to do, he felt Beth's hand grab hold of his. He heard her shaky breath as he held his while waiting to see what she was going to do next.

Suddenly, he felt her guide his hand across her stomach like he'd been doing before. She moved it slowly across and back again, skimming her skin. He didn't move and stayed rigid still as she guided his hand over her body. The fact that she wanted him doing that, that she wasn't repulsed to wake to find him touching her, made his head spin out of control and he felt himself get even harder, straining against his jeans. He consciously held his hips back, aware of how dangerously close he was to her and how much he was wanting to push himself hard against her.

As she continued to move his hand across he felt her relax into him pushing her shoulders back slightly so she fit more against his lean chest meaning once again, he was assaulted by the warmth and sweet smell of her.

While he was doing everything he could to get a grip on his painfully hard erection and his mind which had started to wonder what it'd be like if he moved his hand just a bit lower, Beth suddenly pushed her hips back and in doing so, ground her ass against his cock.

Before he could stop himself a groan slipped out of his lips and he heard a sharp intake of breath from her.

In an attempt to get a grip on what the hell was happening, he moved his hand from it's ministrations on her stomach and grabbed hold of her hip. He managed to push her forward slightly, so she was no longer pushing against his hard-on but he knew he was way too late and she'd already felt it there.

" _Beth_." He rasped into her ear, wondering what the fuck he was going to say to explain himself and explain why he was so fucking hard over the girl who'd come to be his partner and companion over the last year. He suddenly felt sick with himself and his body and wanted to say something about how he didn't mean it but his mind was still thinking about how good it felt and how he wanted more of Beth. He desperately wanted to be able to see her face to try and read what the hell she was thinking.

She didn't answer or move to turn and face him and instead threaded her fingers through his which were now digging into her hip. Using her own hand on top of his to break through his resistance, she once again pushed her hips back against him, grinding harder this time against his cock so there was no mistaking she meant to do it.

He groaned again in her ear and realised whatever self-restraint he was trying to have was quickly diminishing. With his mind completely now lost to nothing but thoughts of Beth's ass and the heat of her in his arms, he let himself give in to the overwhelming need for her that he couldn't control and did something that his willpower wasn't able to stop. It felt like his body was someone else's and his mind had no say in what was happening.

Unable to stop himself, he dug his nails into her hip even further, and pulled her as hard as he could against his throbbing cock, feeling his own hips flex to grind against her.

This time it was Beth who let out a moan and pushed harder against him in response. He clenched his teeth together and scrunched his eyes shut at the overwhelmingly delicious feeling of the friction right where he needed it.

He felt like he was in drunken haze of just Beth and nothing else and his feeling of utter need and desire was completely overtaking him. It had been so fucking long since he'd felt anything even remotely like this and all he could suddenly think about was letting go of her hip and sliding his hand into her jeans, rubbing on her slick wet folds and making her cum so fucking hard and _shit_ , he knew he'd completely lost his grip on reality because this was Beth he was thinking these things about.

She ground hard against him and before he started to wonder whether he was going to cum in his jeans right then and there, she grabbed his hand and with hers on top of his, pushed it up under her shirt on top of one of her breasts and squeezed.

" _Fuck_." He groaned immediately, in a desperate whisper, thrusting his hips forwards hard as she moaned and dropped her head back against him.

There was just a thin piece of material between his hand and her exposed breast and as he felt her hardened nipple, he clenched his teeth, screwed his eyes shut and leaned his forehead against her as he started to think about what it'd be like to take it in his mouth.

With her hand still over his, she held it hard against her breast for a moment longer, pushing it upwards so it squeezed her hard. Lacing her fingers more tightly through his hand, she suddenly released her breast and started to move his hand quickly down her body, in desperate jolting motions.

As she pushed his hand down her stomach, he could hear her short and quickened breaths and he just about lost his mind at what was happening.

He could feel his own breath becoming more ragged and there was no room in his mind to wonder whether this was right or not because _god_ he was so desperate to touch her. In the frantic movements he shifted his position so he leaned up slightly, making it easier for her to take his hand where she wanted it and _fuck_ he wanted to be able to see with his own eyes where she was taking it. The new position allowed him to brush his nose and lips against her exposed neck and he said her name against her skin in a pained whisper as their hands got closer to her belt buckle. She didn't even stop to undo it, desperately pushing his hands down underneath it and he groaned again as his hand first felt her curls, but she kept pushing him further and he was so fucking hard for her -

The loud bang of a door made them both jump and Daryl pulled his hand back immediately. The bang was quickly followed by loud and unchecked footsteps of three, maybe four people.

"This one'll do for the night boys." They heard a voice call directly below them.


	9. Chapter 9

Beth rolled onto her back and looked up at Daryl who hadn't moved from his position. He stared down at her flushed appearance and she looked searchingly at his face as they listened to hear more of what was happening beneath them.

"Swear someone's here Joe. No walkers in any'a the houses? Tracks coming in from the woods? Something ain't right." Another voice said.

"Well Len, since you suddenly know 'lot more'n the rest of us, why don't you run along and check it out?" The first voice said.

Beth stared up at Daryl now a look of panic on her face. He stared down at her for a few more seconds, the intensity of his eyes burning into her. _She was so fucking beautiful_ , he allowed himself to think for a second. Without another moment, with a tilt of his head to the side, they both got up silently and began swiftly packing up their stuff.

In less than a minute, they were ready to go and Beth, with her pack on her back and his in her hand, stopped and looked at Daryl for further instruction, as he crept silently over to the skylight, just as they heard loud footsteps coming up the stairs in the house.

"Got this feeling Joe. Something ain't right here!" The voice called, followed by a quiet mutter only they could here, "And I'm gonna show you dumb fucks who's smart around here."

Daryl turned the handle on the window and sent prayers up to whoever was up there that the window was fairly new, so opened silently and swiftly. He beckoned her forward and grabbed one of the christmas decoration boxes that he place under the exit. Taking her hand he helped her up on to the box and watched her impatiently as she hoisted herself out and onto the slanted roof.

Putting his crossbow on his back, he hopped up onto the box and pulled himself out and up onto the roof. Beth was sitting a little way to give him room to get out and as he looked at her she held her finger up to her lips and pointed to the front of the house, where smoke was curling up from the front yard.

He nodded and gestured towards the woods where they'd come from. Nodding, she lead the way, sliding silently down the tiles of the roof towards the edge. Daryl felt the panic rise in him as it looked like she was going to slide right over the edge, but instead, right at the last minute, she spun around, lowered herself over the edge and seemed to get purchase on something.

Quickly following her, he realised being the smart girl his Beth was, she'd seen the creepers, figured there'd be a trellis and had been right.

With their freedom so desperately in sight, they were hurrying down the trellis making more noise than they should and moved even faster when they heard a voice from inside the house.

"What the fuck is that? Scott, what you waitin' for? Go check it out!"

They were so close now and Daryl felt the rising panic that they were so exposed where they were. Just as soon as they dropped to the floor, he grabbed Beth's hands and they ran into the woods, just as they heard the back door opening.

With her hand securely in his, he ran as fast as he could and didn't look back.

As they walked along the treeline next to a country road the next day, Beth was miserable. Daryl was quiet. So painfully quiet and uncomfortable around her, adding to her feeling that she'd completely fucked things up between them.

They'd managed to get away and as soon as Daryl had obviously decided they were at a safe distance, he'd dropped her hand and barely been able to look at her. She'd tried a few playful and teasing comments about safe topics, like tv shows and food but he'd glanced only quickly at her before averting his eyes and spoke only when it was absolutely necessary, like when she asked where they were heading. This was the thing about being stuck with only one person at the end of the world; whatever happened, you couldn't exactly take time out from the other and you still had to communicate even when you didn't want to.

She was so mad with herself because for most of the last six months or so, they hadn't really had a reason to want to take time out from each other. And yet last night, by practically forcing herself on Daryl, she'd created a horrible tension in their little group of two. Added to that the tension she felt rolling off him from the close call with the men, she was expecting this to be a shitty day.

Beth still couldn't quite understand what had happened last night. She'd been fast asleep and woken to his featherlight touch on her stomach. It was so unbelievably unlike Daryl but then he had started stroking her hair at night to comfort her; so it could have been innocent enough. But that combined with the feel of his strong body all around her had made her react instantly and she felt the pooling heat between her legs.

When she pushed back to feel closer to him she'd felt his hard cock against her and _god_ , it made her want him so much knowing that she could do that to him. She knew she wasn't very experienced like she imagined he was, but she just let her body guide her and in that moment, all her body wanted was to feel him again and feel the friction of him hard against her.

When she made his hand grab her breast, the roughness of his hands against her nipple made her feel so unbelievably wet and in need of him, all her mind could think about was what those hands would feel like touching her where she'd touched herself before.

Had those men not arrived at the house, she didn't know what would have happened if they hadn't of been interrupted.

She was coming to realise there was something way more to her feelings for him than she realised. She cared for him like she'd never cared for anyone in her life and she felt like they'd become so close that she wouldn't know who she was without him. He was strong, loyal, kind and protected and looked after her like she was the most important person on earth. She knew all these things and had for a while now but she hadn't started to think too much on what they meant.

But recently, she'd started to have other thoughts about him. When it'd be raining and his hair would stick to his face or when he'd be lifting something and she'd watch his muscles flex; all these things were making her realise there was a reason she kept finding any excuse to touch him. And now she couldn't help finding herself constantly thinking about what it'd be like to have his mouth on hers or his hands running up her body.

She wasn't stupid. She recognised that she was becoming overwhelmingly attracted to him, but what did that mean about how he felt for her? He treated her like she was the most important person in the world but isn't that just part of Daryl being a good person? She sometimes caught him staring at her with those intense blue eyes of his, but she could never read what he was thinking.

But then, last night, how his body had responded to her, that must have meant something. She blushed, thinking back to how he'd said he name like a prayer as he'd run his lips over her neck. He wanted her too and she didn't think he would have stopped her had they be able to continue. She frowned, thinking on that last thought. Had she pushed him into that? Had she taken advantage of the fact that his reaction is what all men would have had being curled up that close to a woman? What's worse, she thought with a deeper frown, she was pushing him into doing something _to_ her. If he didn't want to do it and she pushed him into it, she knew how much he'd probably blame himself and forget the part she played in that.

"You even listenin' to anythin' I'm saying girl?" Her thoughts interrupted, she glanced up at Daryl walking beside her who was staring down at her. She felt a blush creep up her cheeks at the same time that Daryl seemed to realise and he stared at her for a beat longer before quickly averting his eyes.

"Said our flasks are out. Gotta find water." He said looking straight ahead now.

She didn't answer but only nodded, feeling even more down by his inability to look at her.

Daryl walked slightly ahead of Beth silently with a measured pace, feeling like a total ass. He absolutely couldn't believe what the hell nearly happened last night. Beth was pretty much unconscious with sleep and he'd started stroking her. He tried to tell himself he was just comforting her like he always did but he knew that was total bullshit.

He was completely consumed by her last night and he let it nearly overtake his whole damn mind. He did also realise that it was completely stupid now to pretend to himself he didn't feel more for her than he'd ever felt for anyone in his whole life. He felt like he would do anything to keep her safe. Beth was smart, kind and sweet and, what he'd start to notice more and more recently, she was beautiful. It hit him hard to know that his thoughts were turning less and less pure about her and he'd started noticing new things like the curve of her ass or the swell of her lips. None of those thoughts were helped when she told him about the things she'd done with her ex-boyfriends Jimmy and Zach and he'd spent nights trying to imagine exactly what it was she meant by "ticking off all other bases."

But this was Beth. Her sweetness and kindness were exactly why he shouldn't be thinking of her in this way. She deserved someone better and hell, she deserved someone a lot younger too. He frowned thinking about their ages and felt his cheeks heat up in shame at the memory of him near enough shoving his hands in her pants last night. That was totally wrong and he hung his head at the thought that he'd nearly taken advantage of her.

What last night had taught him though, was that when it comes to Beth, he had no control. What he needed to do is not let himself get in a situation again where his willpower would be so tested. He decided as they walked along the road that he'd do just that and made a pact to keep his distance.


	10. Chapter 10

Daryl's pact to himself to keep his distance from Beth was tested within an hour of him making it.

In a bid to stop his mind from wandering to Beth and last night, he'd thrown himself more than he needed to into finding a stream to fill their flasks. He put years of tracking experience into practice and looked at everything from the denseness of the woods to the softness of the ground and the type of undergrowth that was around. They would have found one soon enough without him needing to give it 110% but it was helping distract his mind.

Beth knew him well enough to know to keep quiet today and let him lead, following him with a silent tread of her own.

When the trees eventually thinned out Daryl's efforts were rewarded with not just a stream, but a decent sized river with a gentle current of pure looking water. Both of them visibly relaxed at the find and after a quick sweep of the immediate vicinity, Daryl set about replenishing their flasks by the water's edge.

Beth stared at the water and was struck by the thought that it'd been over two weeks before either of them had had any kind of decent wash. She didn't want to push the boundaries on what felt like was already a tumultuous day for their partnership but she didn't know when they'd next get an opportunity like this again. She tried to think how a survivor like Daryl would think and the voice in her head was telling her that he wouldn't let feelings and emotions get in the way of what needed to be done to survive.

With that she decided she wasn't going to either.

"Daryl, you got me covered?" She asked, already stripping off her vest as she stepped towards the water's edge.

"Beth, what you doing -" His cheeks immediately flamed red and he spun around to face the woods as he caught a glimpse of her soft, pale back.

His immediate reaction disappointed her but was what she expected; with everything that had happened between them recently, she was sad to see that the way they worked together in partnership had already been impacted. Not too long ago, Beth would bathe and Daryl would take watch and yeah, he would occasionally remember to give her privacy but it wasn't like this.

Often he'd sit with his back against a tree, smoking a cigarette and looking at her while she dried herself off, but he was clearly distracted by his thoughts, making comments on things like what sort of game they should expect with the seasons and how they'd need to adapt their inventory.

It took a while for him to get to that point and now he was back to being uncomfortable Daryl and Beth hated that she'd caused that. She finished stripping off and sunk into the cold water, calling after him that she was in, but he still didn't turn around. Beth sighed and dunked her head.

Daryl stood facing the treeline, the image of Beth's back burned into his mind. He shut his eyes and tried to remember back to all the other times she'd bathed with him there and tried to picture what he knew about her body. When she called from behind him that she was in, he didn't dare turn around, but his mind went into overdrive thinking about the water lapping on her smooth skin. He sighed, squeezed his eyes shut and ran a hand over his face. Well he was doing a fine old job of keeping his distance, he thought to himself.

In the seconds that he'd shut his eyes and with his mind completely consumed by Beth, he'd missed the noise and sight of three walkers coming right out of the woods heading directly for him. His eyes snapped open just as the first one was in reaching distance and he had just enough time to swing his crossbow up into it's jaw, before the second one was grabbing for him.

Grabbing his knife from its holster, he rammed it hard into its head, stepping backwards to allow it to fall. As he did though, the back of his ankle hit something hard and he lost his footing, falling backwards onto the ground and losing hold of the knife, watching it skid across the ground towards the water.

Before he'd had a chance to push himself up, the final walker fell onto him and he just managed to grab hold of its shoulders as its jaws snapped ominously near his face. He vaguely acknowledged someone yell as his mind scrambled around for how the hell he was going to get out of this one.

While using all his strength to hold it's jaws away from him, the walker's head seemed to suddenly explode on top of him, covering him in dark brown blood as it went limp in his arms.

He quickly shoved it off him and pulled himself into a sitting position, before realising someone was standing in front of him. Right there, in nothing but a soaking wet bra and briefs stood Beth.

Soaked from head to toe and holding his knife dripping with blood, Daryl was suddenly fascinated by the little streams of water running over her skin as she breathed heavily from exertion.

"You OK?" She breathed.

He stared up at her and took a moment to take in the full appearance of her. She was _fucking amazing_. It was like everything else around her disappeared and all he could see was the curves of her hips, the softness of her pale skin and the smooth lines of her lean legs.

While still staring up at her he swallowed as his eyes were drawn to something else. Her once white bra and briefs, soaked from the river, had turned completely translucent and clung to her. He noticed the shade of her nipples and the dark patch of her hair and _holy shit_ , he wanted to touch her so bad and he couldn't look anywhere else.

Beth meanwhile, was just mentally recovering from the utter terror of seeing Daryl nearly devoured by a walker with her only meters away. She felt like she couldn't move fast enough as she ran out of the water, scooping up his knife from the water's edge as she went.

Now with the assurance that Daryl was safe, she stood in front of him waiting for him to answer her question. As she did, she suddenly notice a shift in his expression from the panic of what just happened to something entirely new. At first he looked completely in awe, as if he was staring at a stranger that he'd never seen before, but then it shifted and she suddenly felt like she couldn't breathe under the burning intensity of his gaze. Still not saying anything, he looked at her almost hungrily and his eyes roamed her body making her blush.

A slight breeze made her suddenly realise exactly what she was wearing standing before him and she quickly moved her hands to try to cover herself up.

The action seemed to bring him to his senses and he immediately schooled his features, replacing the heaviness of his gaze with a blank look as he looked away from her.

Without another second, he pulled himself up and walked past her with another glance. He seemed to stomp angrily towards the woods and for a second she thought he was just going to leave her there.

"Can you give me a minute?!" She called after him, frantically trying to pick up her clothes and pull on her jeans. He glanced over to her with what she could only interpret as an angry look on his face before he turned away again but stood still waiting.

Later that night, Beth settled ready for sleep feeling the saddest she'd felt in months, despite their good fortune in finding the small cabin she was currently settling in. They'd pretty much stumbled across it; Daryl leading the way with not a word or a look at her. It was a single-story wood building, with a small porch, a bedroom, lounge and small kitchen and a door leading out the back.

Even though it granted them shelter and they'd caught food on the way, Daryl's mood had been awful.

When she went to settle in the lounge next to him to get to sleep, he'd got up and settled himself by the window instead, mumbling something about needing to concentrate on watch. She couldn't help thinking this was still about what happened in the loft and she mentally cursed herself for messing things up.

She fell into a fitful sleep, with dreams of Daryl leaving her without a trace.


	11. Chapter 11

The next day, even though Beth was pleased Daryl hadn't run off in the night, his mood had only slightly improved. He was no longer surly, but instead was serious; completely and utterly focussed on survival and future planning, with no room for chatting or teasing.

While Beth silently heated them up a tin of beans for breakfast, he stood with the map spread in front of him with a deep frown on his face.

Although Beth felt partly to blame for his new over-exaggerated disinterest in her, she was started to lose her patience with the current state of affairs. They only had each other after all and while yes, she probably shouldn't have pushed the boundaries of their partnership, she wasn't doing it to mess around or because she was bored; she felt something between them that she'd tried to make sense of in what maybe wasn't the best way. Even so, the near-silent treatment was started to grate on her.

"Well?" She said frustratedly at him as he continued to stare at the map. He looked up with a frown on his face at her interruption of his thoughts.

"What?" He asked sharply.

"Well what you thinkin'? Where are we on the map? What do we need to do today? What's the plan? What's on your mind?" She asked, unable to help the frustration enter her tone.

He continued to stare at her through the slits of his eyes for long enough to just start to make her feel uncomfortable before he started folding up the map.

"Not comfortable how close we are to a main road. Didn't do a sweep of the area when we got here and not likin' feeling like we don't know what's around us. Don't know these parts'a the woods either. Think I need to check out the area. Make sure we ain't got no company." He answered, not looking at her as he started moving about the cabin and packing up his pack, as they did every day.

"Think ' _I_ ' need to check out the area? As in just you alone?" Beth asked, unable to mask the disappointment spreading across her as she realised the extent in which he was pulling away from her now. While they did occasionally split if it wasn't too far and they both had a base to return to, it wasn't something they'd do unless there was an essential reason.

"No point in us both goin' and ain't planning on heading out too far." He said, now staring at her as if he was trying to read something. "Figured you could set some traps not too far from the house in case it looks OK for us to stay."

She stared back at him. She wasn't stupid. He could just as easily set the traps with her when he got back. This wasn't a reason, this was his way of retreating away from her and she hated it.

"Makes sense." She answered quietly, holding his gaze.

She felt unbelievably upset that a year's worth of building something was gone in one stupid night. But she was never going to force something on him; she cared for him and if he needed to retreat from this, then she'd have to just live with that. She knew he'd never ever leave her and would always protect her, but if he needed to keep it at just that, then she needed to understand that. She cared too much for him to make him feel uncomfortable, no matter how sad it made her feel.

Ten minutes later, Daryl was treading silently through the woods alone, feeling like he could finally breathe again. He couldn't get a grip on his thoughts, actions, hell anything at the moment when it came to Beth. He felt like he couldn't breathe or remember how to speak and every time she looked at him with those big expectant eyes he felt like his was suffocating. He could barely look at her face without the picture of her by the river in her underwear assaulted his mind and every time she touched his arm or shoulder, he was overwhelmed with the memory of him holding her hips against him. He hated that she had no control over that, yet he had no idea what to do other than to try and get away from her.

He'd never ever leave her and the thought of being without her made him feel sick, but he needed to somehow get her to stop looking at him or innocently touching him because he was going out of his mind. He knew he was attracted to her, he knew he cared for her and he knew that was where all this was coming from, but he also knew he absolutely wasn't right for her. There wasn't exactly choice left in this world when it came to relationships, but he absolutely wasn't about to take advantage of that for his own gain, and use it as a means to have Beth for himself. He would continue to be her partner out here and do everything in his power to keep her safe and maybe one day, they'd find a group and there'd be someone there who could do just that but who'd be able to give her what she wants too. Daryl felt his fists clench at the thought of anyone becoming that to Beth. How the hell was he ever gonna let her go?

He sighed and let his mind close off those thoughts, just as he reached the road he'd been searching for. Sure enough he'd not gone half an hour in a semi-circle from the cabin and he'd found a large main road. He frowned, thinking about how close it was to their current shelter.

Before doing a final sweep to check there was no one, dead or alive, who could follow him, he set off back in the most direct route towards the cabin, already hating the thought of disappointing Beth by telling her they'd need to move on.

As Daryl was coming up to the clearing where the cabin was, he heard something that made his blood run cold. A voice. A male voice that he didn't recognise and it was coming right from where he knew their cabin was.

"Now that's your own fault! You shouldn'a struggled! Like I said, we don't wanna hurt you!" The voice said desperately.

Daryl went into his frame of mind when he hunted; he detached himself from every thought or feeling and let himself zone every out around him so that all his senses and focus were on the one thing he was after. He silently brought his crossbow round from his back, crouched slightly and walked forward with a swiftness and silence to his step that only he could could master. Protected by the undergrowth and trees, he was able to get to the edge of the clearing and take in the scene before him.

Standing just by the back steps of the cabin was Beth, restrained by a tall, lanky man behind her who had one arm across her body holding her against him, while his other hand held a knife to her throat. Standing directly in front of them was a waif of a woman, with painfully thin limbs, holding a large shotgun pointing directly at Beth.

But most of all, his eyes were drawn to Beth. Her top was ripped and she was bleeding from her stomach, but she didn't look in pain; she looked angry.

"Please let me go. And like I said, I'll give you half our food. But I can't give it all to you. You must know that." Beth said through gritted teeth.

Daryl wasn't listening to what Beth was saying but was silently scanning the surrounding area, checking there were no other people, while loading his bow.

"I'm sorry." The woman said tearfully, shaking as she held the gun. "But we need this. I ain't spending another night out in the open with no food. If you ain't willing to go and leave us your stuff, then I'm going to have to shoot you."

That was all Daryl needed to tell him what kind of people they were. He didn't care if they were desperate, they had Beth and that was enough. He steadily raised his bow, narrowed his eyes down the sightline and fired, barely waiting for his bolt to hit it's target before he was already stepping out into the clearing.

Just as the woman's head exploded as his bolt hit, the man holding Beth looked up in horror as Daryl strode purposefully towards him with a deadly expression and his eyes narrowed in on the man. Beth, noticing Daryl around the same time, was a second quicker at responding than the man, grabbing hold of his hand that held the knife while whipping her head back hard to connect with his behind her.

As he stumbled back in shock Daryl was already on him, grabbing him by his collar and yanking him backwards to the ground away from Beth. In one swift motion, Daryl removed his knife from his holster, grabbed the man by his hair and yanked him to his knees, and pulling his head back, he glanced the knife right across his throat.

While the man grabbed at his own neck and gargled in horror, Daryl swung his bow back over his shoulders into his hands and shot a bolt right through the man's head.

The sudden silence was deafening.

Daryl's eyes immediately looked for Beth and he dropped the bow as she came towards him. She threw her arms around him and he let her, wrapping his around her tightly and placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head. He held her tightly, now letting himself feel the fear he felt earlier at the sight her in trouble.

"They hurt you?" He asked into her hair.

"M'fine." She mumbled, her answer muffled as she spoke it into his shirt.

He suddenly remembered the blood he saw on her earlier and he quickly released her, pushing her backwards slightly with his hold on her forearms as he inspected her.

"You are not fine." He frowned deeply, looking at the blood that was down the bottom of her shirt.

"Guess you forgot to tell me the ol' elbow in the groin trick don't work if they gotta knife." She smiled sheepishly at him.

"Thought I taught you if they gotta knife, it's the scream for Daryl trick." He said, attempting to be playful with her but still unable to shake his frown as he guided her towards the cabin by a hand on her shoulder.

"C'mon let's get that looked at." He said. "I'll deal with 'em in a minute." He finished, sensing her look over her shoulder at the two bodies in the clearing.

"They just wanted food." Beth said sadly. "Willing to kill someone they never even met for food."

As they walked into the cabin and Daryl started looking for the first aid kit, Beth grew even more pensive.

"I could'a been like that if it weren't for you Daryl." She said quietly looking at him now. "If I hadn'ta been with you. If our whole group hadn'ta been with you even. We could'a been one of the desperate ones too." She paused, looking at him searchingly. "Thank you. For everything."

He'd found the first aid kit and was staring at her now as she held his gaze. He averted his eyes quickly before answering.

"Shouldn't thank me. Should never have left you today." He said quietly still not looking her.

She smiled softly at him, hoping that maybe there was more to that statement and they could go back to how they were again. She walked to where he stood and hopped up on the counter.


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note - It's really nice that people are enjoying my little story. Claimers coming soon and things won't be as rosy. Sorry!**

"Well then, Dr Dixon, what's the prognosis?" She asked and he snorted before standing in front of her with a rag and bandages.

Beth lifted her vest up so it was level with her bra, revealing a sizable yet shallow cut horizontally across her middle.

Daryl seemed to quickly avert her eyes and she suddenly thought that if she wasn't careful, she was going to push him away again.

"You want me t'do it?" She asked softly, in almost a whisper while she looked at him standing in front of her. The height of the counter meant she was eye level with him but he still wasn't looking directly at her.

"Nah, I got it." He rasped quietly, looking around for one of their flasks.

He poured some water onto the rag and Beth stretched her back up straight and held her vest a little higher so he could properly get to the cut. Beth felt her cheeks flush but tried to keep any feeling of tension away as she knew this is exactly the kind of situation that would send Daryl running again.

Daryl seemed to visibly swallow as he placed one hand on the counter beside her, using it as balance as he leaned down slightly to get a proper view of what he was doing.

He wiped the rag slowly along her stomach and Beth tried to stare straight ahead as he did, doing everything she could to keep the memories at bay of just the other night when he was doing this in an entirely different context.

The silence was becoming suffocating and she felt desperately like she needed to say something to break the tension.

"How's it lookin'?" She croaked quietly.

He looked up at her from where he was positioned.

"Ain't as bad as it looks." He rasped back, before continuing, "Feel OK?"

"Feels fine." She answered looking down into his eyes. A blush crept over his features before he looked back down at what he was doing.

"Don't think it'll need stitches." He said as he stood up and started unravelling a bandage.

Beth nodded, suddenly missing the feel of him in her space.

Daryl stepped forward again in front of her and seemed to abruptly stop moving, standing like a statue in front of her holding the bandage. Beth was suddenly aware of how uncomfortable he looked which was exactly what she didn't want.

He stepped forward closer again but didn't do anything further and Beth looked at him expectantly trying to understand what was causing the lines of tension rippling through his body.

"Ah Beth you gotta -" He started and gently took hold of her forearm moving in slightly.

"Oh sorry!" Beth's cheeks flamed red as she suddenly realised she needed to hold her arms up slightly to enable him to pass the bandage around the back of her. _God_ after thinking to herself she'd need to give him distance for the sake of their friendship, this is _not_ what she expected would be happening.

As she lifted her arms slightly, she let go of her vest, conscious that if she kept hold of it, she'd be giving him an eyeful of her thin worn bra. As she did though, it fell right back down over the cut. Daryl seemed to stare at it for a moment, before he ever so slowly and gently reached forward and took hold of one side of it in his fingers.

Beth felt her heart start to hammer in her chest and she wondered if he could hear it as the silence around them was deafening. She stared at Daryl waiting to see what he'd do next.

Again, she felt like they were on the edge of something and she was already feeling overwhelmed by the feeling of wanting to reach forward and touch his face. But she was trying to keep her mind completely in control, thinking about what happened last time and reminding herself that whatever happened next, she wasn't going to do anything to push this.

He seemed to stare at the thin piece of material he was holding between his fingers before he slowly raised it, gradually revealing the milky pale expanse of her skin. He held it in place for a second, before he moved his other hand, putting the bandage he was holding down on the counter next to her.

Beth was still watching him daring not to breathe as continued to stare down at the material between his fingers. Without moving his eyes, he took her hold of the other side of her vest in his other hand and slowly lifted it, pulling it up over her arms which were still slightly raised and right over her head.

Beth gasped as she lifted her arms up, aiding him in taking her vest completely off. He still wasn't looking at her, instead watching the vest as he put it down on the side next to her.

Beth sat there in her just her bra and jeans feeling like she was struggling to get control of her breathing as he stood in front of her, staring down at her stomach.

Picking the bandage up again, he moved even closer to the counter and put both hands behind her back, passing the bandage from one to the other before bringing it round to the front again. As he reached behind her, Beth involuntarily felt her open her legs slightly, enabling him to get closer as he did.

As he passed the bandage around his fingers gently brushed against her skin and Beth felt like her whole body was on fire. Subconsciously, she leaned back slightly with her hands on the counter, meaning he was needing to lean more closer to her and shift more between her legs to continue bandaging her.

As he continued to gently pass the bandage around her, she became aware of his uneven breathing and noticed the slight shake to his hands. His distance to her meant Beth got the full scent of leather and the woods that was so Daryl, she was finding it hard to ignore the heat spreading through her and pooling in between her legs.

As he taped the end of the bandage, he smoothed it down with his fingers and Beth couldn't help the hitch in her breath as he did. He glanced up sharply at her as she did and Beth felt pinned in place by the burning intensity of his gaze.

He looked down again at his hand that was still frozen over the bandage on her stomach and suddenly, in a motion that completely surprised Beth, he ran his fingers across the bandage again before delicately tracing them down her side before resting on her hip.

At the feel of his rough hands over her bare skin, Beth was struggling to get control of her own actions now and without thinking, she parted her legs slightly wider, noticing how he seemed to shift forward as she did. Staring at his hand on her hip, Daryl's eyes moved across to his other hand which now came to rest on her other hip, while Beth watched his face, desperate to understand his unreadable expression.

Despite her earlier promise to herself that she wouldn't push him, she was starting to lose her grip on what was right and wrong, feeling only how much her body wanted to be closer to him right now. Being led by only the need she could feel in her body, she shifted one leg and gently hooked her ankle to the back of one of his legs, gently applying pressure to bring him even closer. She heard him release a shaky breath as she did and she felt his fingers flex slightly on her waist.

Daryl was now standing completely between her parted legs, still staring down at his hands and all her mind was beginning to think about was how much her core was starting to throb under the intensity of his gaze and closeness of his hips.

She leaned forward and gently rested her hands on either side of his chest and leaned down slightly to try to see his face. When he looked up, their faces were just inches apart and his eyes were so dark and his expression so intense she felt her heart hammering even louder than before. Without thinking what she was doing she hooked her ankle round his other leg and pulled harder this time on them both, the movement bringing him right against the counter and just inches away from where she realised she was desperately trying to get some purchase.

She heard her own breathy sigh in frustration. Staring her in the eye with a burning intensity, Beth felt Daryl's hands shift, sliding slowly round her back and then lower, until they both covered the curve of her ass in her jeans. Pausing for a moment, he then gripped on and pulled her forward.

The motion caused her centre to connect with the hardness she felt in his jeans and she couldn't help the breathy moan that her escaped her lips as she did.

The motion meant she was now completely up against him with her forehead resting on one of his shoulders. She slid her arms around his neck and with one hand, ran her fingers into his hair dragging her nails as she went.

She heard him groan in response and his fingernails dug into where his hands still were on his ass.

Losing all control now, Beth felt herself desperately craving the feeling of friction between her legs and she attempted to shift further forward on the counter, pulling harder with her ankles on his legs.

She felt like Daryl was starting to lose control too, as he gripped her ass, pulling her harder against his cock.

" _Fuck_ ," he cursed breathlessly into her ear and the sensation spread a whole new desire through her, feeling the slickness in between her legs increasing as she rocked upwards, still trying to build the friction there.

Daryl seemed to need the same thing she did and using his grip on her ass, he ground her onto him, dropping his forehead onto her shoulder with his teeth clenched and eyes squeezed shut as Beth let out another moan.

Now letting her body completely take control, Beth felt herself push her chest up against him and in doing so, Daryl stood up slightly, now with his wild eyes fully roaming over her body when he hadn't allowed himself to before.

With a wildness and hunger his eyes, he grabbed hold of one of the straps of her bra and pulled it down hard and abruptly completely exposing her breast.

In doing so, the wiring of the bottom of the bra pulled over her wound and she couldn't help the pained intake of breath as it did.

For Daryl, her sudden pained sound broke the spell he was in and his eyes met hers with his hungry look immediately replaced with a look of horror.

Still breathing heavily and in the haze of wanting him, she realised she was going to need to do something quickly or Daryl was going to run again.

Just as she felt him shift to step back she grabbed hold of his wrist.

"Daryl." She said surprised by the thickness of her voice.

"Daryl don't run. It's OK. Please." She asked, staring pleadingly at his face.

He stared at her for what felt like an eternity, before he nodded and turned away stepping back into the kitchen space.

"Shit." He cursed loudly while pressing the balls of his hands into his eyes.

Beth quickly righted her bra strap and hopped off the counter and came to stand in front of him. Taking hold of his wrists she moved his hands away from his face.

"Daryl. I'm fine. Please don't do this. Please don't pull away again." She asked again, searching his face for an answer.

He stared down at her and for a second she read all his vulnerabilities in his look. There was self-loathing, regret and sorrow, but also a kindness and traces of lust still there too.

He seemed to look at her intently for a moment before he nodded.

"Need to go deal with those bodies. Not running. Not pullin' away." He said as he walked towards the door. He stopped and turned to her before finishing, "Ain't leaving you again Beth." before he turned and walked out the door.


	13. Chapter 13

Daryl felt like there was an electric current running through his body as his dug the graves in the woods. It was like his body was still humming from what just happened between him and Beth in the kitchen. There was absolutely no denying now that things had changed beyond recognition between them.

Just a few weeks ago, he would have bandaged her up, worrying about things like whether he was hurting her, if the wound would get infected and how long she'd take to heal up.

Now, he couldn't even fix an injury without fantasising about running his hands up her thighs and taking her mouth with his. The need he felt for her was starting to become overpowering and he wondered whether every time they got close it'd end like this; him with his hands all over her and grinding her hard against where he needed her.

He felt almost dizzy with the memory.

What confused him even more is this time, it was all him. Beth was just waiting to be patched up and he'd stripped her of her vest and ran his hands over her ass. _Shit,_ the image of her sitting there in just her bra. She was something the fuck else.

Things had definitely shifted and as he dug the grave, he tried hard to convince himself that because they hadn't kissed yet, he hadn't done anything wrong and maybe if he got a grip on himself and his body, he could stop blurring the lines with what they were. But he also knew that was bullshit, hell in his hazy need for her, he'd practically torn the bra off her and he felt his face burn in a mixture of both shame and arousal at the thought.

Whatever he was trying to convince himself, his mind wasn't going to leave him be and it started wandering to the scene he'd just left imagining how it could have played out if they'd kept going. _Fuck_ he would have leaned forward and taken her breast in his mouth and he felt like salivating at the thought of his tongue on her hard nipple. The feel of his hands on her ass, all he would have needed to do is unbuckle her belt and pull her jeans and briefs down and hell, he could have been more than grinding against her, he would have just needed to drop his jeans and with his hand guiding him he could have thrust his cock hard into her, grabbing hold of her ass to pull her closer as he did and - _shit._

He clenched tightly to the handle of the spade as he tried to get his body to calm the fuck down, feeling the hardness in his jeans not going away. What the fuck has happened to him. She had gone from being a partner to being the object of his sick little fantasies and he definitely need to stop this.

He had come to realise it was stupid to think he'd be able to just turn this off now and they'd go back to as they were, but he couldn't shake the feeling that he was taking advantage of their partnership and how she cared for him as she would a member of their old family.

As he often did, he let his mind wander to their old group and he tried to imagine what they'd think on all this. He tried to replay the scene in the kitchen in his head, of his hands on her ass and grinding her against him - only looking at it through someone from their groups eyes like Rick or Maggie. He groaned and shut his eyes in shame at that. There is no way on this goddamn earth anyone would have looked at that and thought that was OK. Seeing it through their eyes again reminded him that just because they were together, it did not mean he had permission to have her as his own.

They needed a group, he thought to himself again. If they carried on just the two of them, then yeah, all that's gonna happen is every time she gets near him, he'll struggle to get a grip on himself and eventually he's gonna take this too far and then what. Maybe if they found a group she'd get some space from him and he'd keep these little fantasies restrained in his mind.

 _But people ain't good no more_ , he thought to himself, looking idly over to the two bodies he'd dragged over to the grave. His mood immediately shifted as he remembered back to seeing Beth restrained by the man with the woman's gun pointed at her and he felt sick. _What the fuck is a world where people would wanna hurt people like Beth?_ He thought angrily now. No way is he letting her anywhere near a group. There's worse people in the world who would want to take more than food from her and he hardened his viewpoint that finding a group was not the answer.

Whatever happens, he decided as he gave the first body a hard shove with his foot so it fell into the grave, he would be good to her and protect her, even if that meant from himself.

Daryl had already made the decision that they'd stay that night in the cabin. While he didn't like the location and it felt too exposed, he could feel a storm coming and knew being recently injured and out in the rain all night was a recipe for Beth getting sick. She could get set up in the bedroom and he'd sit himself in the hall, keeping watch of both the back and front doors. They'd leave at first light once the rain stopped and find somewhere deeper in the woods. He was becoming more and more aware that winter was getting closer and since they had decided to stop looking for their family, their aim had been on finding somewhere to stay for a while where they'd be protected from the elements. So far, they'd failed at that miserably.

Later that evening, as the rain hammered outside, Beth and Daryl were tentative with each other. They were quiet, spoke in soft voices and smiled carefully at each other and Beth felt so grateful that Daryl meant what he said and he wasn't pulling away. There wasn't any of her teasing or his arrogant smirk when he'd pissed her off, but this softness was better than nothing and she'd take it.

After they'd quietly passed a tin of corn back and forth, Beth sitting on the sofa and Daryl on the floor with his back against it, Daryl stood and put out the little stove before standing in front of her and holding his hand out.

Beth smiled softly and let him pull her up, before standing in front of him as he stood awkwardly in front of her rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to work out to explain what he wanted to say.

"Beth, it don't feel safe here." He started as she looked up at him expectantly, waiting for him to go on. "Gonna take watch in the hall." He paused before looking down at her. "Ain't nothin' to do with… S'not because I don't wanna stay with you." He paused again. "Just wanna make sure it's safe. Wanna keep you safe." He finished, his eyes looking to the side before landing on her face in his last sentence.

She smiled up at him understanding that he was trying to tell her he hasn't pulling away but needed to focus and she wouldn't help him with that.

"Alright." She said softly. "Rain should stop in the night. Let's go at first light." She smiled a little wider now and he couldn't help the ghost of a smirk cross his features. She knew he always found it amusing when she'd use what he'd taught her about reading the weather to tell _him_ about what they should expect.

"Yes ma'am." He said with a nod of his head and a quirk of his mouth, before he held the door open to the bedroom for her. Once she was in the room, he gave her a final nod before pulling the door gently to and settling himself in the hall.

 **Author's Note - I haven't quite figured out how to put warnings on stories (sorry - am a newbie) so please avoid next few chapters if you're here for fluffy Beth and Daryl stuff and not awful claimers stuff!**


	14. Chapter 14

Daryl had been sitting in the hallway with his back against the wall, watching the front room gradually take shape in the faint glow of dawn when he felt his head snap up with a jolt.

He looked again at the room and realised while still hazy in the light of dawn, it was definitely brighter and his eyes narrowed involuntarily when he realised he'd fallen asleep.

He let his senses zone in on what was around him, feeling immediately reassured by the noise of Beth's soft breaths as she slept in the bedroom across from where he sat.

He couldn't help the prickly feeling on the back of his neck though and when he zoned his senses to anything else around him, he felt his stomach drop. There was something new he picked up that definitely wasn't there before.

It was the unmistakable smell of cigarette smoke.

Grabbing his crossbow, Daryl silently pulled himself into a crouch and pushed the bedroom door open, to where Beth lay on the bed facing the door fast asleep.

"Beth!" He whispered sharply. After a year on the road, both of them learnt to sleep light and as soon as he said her name, her eyes snapped open and immediately connected with his.

He saw the fear in her eyes almost immediately, Beth knowing without a doubt from his crouched position, his hardened facial expression and the tension in the lines of his body that something was very wrong.

He nodded at her and she nodded back, before silently getting up and grabbing her knife and their packs.

He gestured for her to stay in the room, before creeping towards the lounge. He tread silently to the window on the left and peered out of it. Seeing nothing in the misty dawn light but the clearing and the woods, he did the same with the window on the other side; still finding nothing.

If it wasn't for the growing unease he felt in his stomach, he would have started to wonder whether he was just imagining the smell.

Beth had come out of the room and was standing in the hallway, knife poised, watching Daryl as he moved silently round the lounge checking the windows, feeling the discomfort rolling off him.

Creeping silently to the front door, Daryl turned to Beth and gestured with his hand for her to go back into the bedroom.

When she didn't move at first, not wanting to leave him, he fixed her with a stare so serious and hard, she stared back for a beat longer before nodding and stepping back silently towards the bedroom. She felt a horrible rising panic in her at the fear and unease she could read off Daryl.

Now assured that Beth wouldn't be in the firing line of whatever Daryl was expecting to find out there, he quietly raised his bow, stepped a few steps forward and opened the door.

He wasn't quite sure what he was expecting, an ambush maybe, but as he stepped out with tension rippling through his body he took in an unnerving scene that he wasn't expecting at all.

Before him in the misty haze of the morning stood three men, standing casually in the clearing in front of the porch, looking up at him as if they'd been waiting for him.

A large black man stood the furthest back, leaning against a tree smoking a cigarette, studying Daryl in a curious but idle way. Closer to the house was a tall, lanky man, with greasy black hair and a bow of his own, only his was casually lowered in front of him. He was looking at Daryl with anger and hatred written all over his face.

The one that got Daryl's attention though was the one closest to the porch, a tall man with grey hair, and a charming smile. When Daryl stepped outside, he threw his arms open in a welcome.

"Well hi there!" He cried, his smile widening.

It took Daryl just a second to take in that their relaxed stance meant if he was quick enough, he had a small chance of taking them out without them shooting him and as he pointed the bow at the grey haired man and his finger itched on the trigger, he felt the cool metal that could only come from the end of a gun against his forehead.

Distracted by the men in front of him, Daryl had failed to notice the fourth man on the porch with him, grinning now as he held a gun to Daryl's head. He was the kind of man Merle would have been right at home with before the turn; shaved head, tattoos and a few missing teeth emphasised by his wide smile.

Daryl felt the rage radiating off him and a burning anger already growing inside him at the intruders who had taken him by surprise. He kept his bow raised, finger ready on the trigger.

"Well now!" The grey haired man laughed. "By the way you're pointing that thing at me, I'd say you're not a talkative kinda guy!"

"What the fuck do you want?" Daryl ground out, holding his bow steady and ignoring the pressure of the gun to the side of his head.

The man held his smile. "Shouldn't we start with the formalities?! I'm Joe and it's good to meet you." He said easily and waited for Daryl to respond. When Daryl said nothing and didn't move a muscle, Joe continued.

"Well then let's just skip straight to the point shall we?" He smiled. "You have something that we want." As he said it, Joe gestured behind Daryl at the cabin.

Daryl was fucking mad. He had a fucking gun to his head and these assholes thought they could just threaten him and take his shit. H'd known guys like this; asshole pricks who could act the big man because they numbers.

As he tried to contain the rage burning inside him, he thought of Beth hidden away in the bedroom and suddenly thought that he needed to play this carefully to keep her safe. If they wanted the cabin, fuck it, him and Beth were planning on leaving anyway, they can have it and he could get Beth away from them unnoticed.

Daryl stared at the man for a second longer before responding.

"Alright." He started. "You can have the fucking cabin. I'm gonna go inside, get my shit and go then you can have it." He spat out, not bothering to keep the rage from his voice.

The man stared at him for a second before bursting into loud, uncontained laughter which reverberated in Daryl's ears. The greasy looking guy standing by him smirked and snickered at this.

Daryl continued to stare, holding his bow steady still pointing at the man, narrowing his eyes even further.

The man finally seemed to catch his breath before answering.

"You think we tracked you all the way from town for this?!" The man gestured at the cabin behind him, before dissolving into his loud, brash laugh again.

Daryl felt his blood run cold. The smell of smoke he woke up to, the man standing by the tree smoking and the curling smoke Beth spotted as they scrambled off that roof in town all suddenly seemed to link together.

He remembered running into the woods as the back door had opened but had never thought they'd been spotted or that someone would track them.

He felt a horrible prickling sensation run through his whole body as he now properly let the man's words sink in. He couldn't help the shock flash across his face before he quickly schooled his features.

Joe seemed to notice and his grin grew wider.

"Now Scott right here - sorry, excuse my manners - this right here is Scott." He gestured to the man standing to Daryl's side who was holding the gun to his head. "As I was saying, Scott right here promised our little group that he's seen the finest little piece of ass EVER - and when I say ever, Scott says even includin' 'fore the turn - hoppin' off the roof of our very own home."

He chuckled to himself before continuing. "Now one little rule we have here in our group is that we don't lie. So when Scott said it was the finest piece of ass, he sure would'a meant it."

Daryl felt every muscle in his body tense when Joe finished speaking and felt his heart hammer in chest at the thought of Beth hidden in the bedroom. He willed with every bone in his body that she'd heard this and had made a run for it out the back door. He was already coming to the decision that they could do whatever the fuck they wanted to him; she needed to get out and she needed to go now.

"She's dead." He rasped. "Got bit yesterday." His mind seemed to moving at a million miles an hour as he scrambled desperately around for how he could convince them.

"You go over there in those trees, you'll see 'er grave." He gestured in the direction of the woods with his bow, where he buried the couple yesterday.

"Is that so?" Joe asked, his eyebrows raising as he asked.

Daryl stared at him trying to read what Joe knew. If they'd followed the tracks then they'd seen both Daryl's and hers, but then that would still make his story that she got bitten stand. Joe grinned at him expectantly. Still not able to get a read on him but praying that his theory was right, Daryl nodded sharply.

Joe looked back at him thoughtfully before calling, loudly "Bo!" and the three men standing around him all smirked at Daryl expectantly. "He speakin' the truth? Is our piece a'tail not in there?" He called.

Almost immediately, Daryl felt as if all the blood drained from his body as he heard Beth's cry from inside the house. Acting on instinct Daryl moved to turn around and go to her, but was struck hard on the head with the butt of the gun.

He groaned loudly in pain and fell to his hands and knees on the porch, his bow immediately ripped out of his hands by Scott as he did. Suddenly defenceless and with the world spinning Daryl tried to get himself to his feet as he saw through his dizzy and hazy vision Beth pushed outside by a man behind her, holding her against him. He noticed bitterly that Beth was unarmed and the man held her knife to her throat.

"Get the fuck off her!" Daryl snarled, lunging in the direction of Beth and the man. He felt a searing rage pumping through his body, but it was now mingled with a suffocating fear of what these men planned to do with Beth.

As he lunged forward the butt of the gun connected with his head again and he fell forward to his hands and knees for a second time, before earning a sharp and forceful kick to his stomach that made him grunt in pain.

He was quickly becoming aware of the desperation of their situation and was searching frantically in his mind for a way out.

He heard the click of a gun being cocked and as his vision cleared, he looked up to see Beth standing now in the clearing, still restrained by the large man she came outside with but with a gun pointed at her head by the black man who'd been by the trees.

"Now, now, now." Joe said tauntingly. "You're gonna do what I say and behave because otherwise, little missy here's gonna getta bullet in her head and I'm willing to bet she's somethin' to you." He paused and looked between them thoughtfully. "She ain't kin. Much too good to be kin. But she ain't your tail neither." He looked between them again. "Huh. Well I'm stumped but it don't matter to me either way." He smiled again.

Daryl was still now on his knees looking up at Beth as she stared down at him. He hated the terror he could see in his eyes and tried everything he could to look back reassuringly but he knew his face only expressed the burning rage he felt inside him.

"Well first of all, Scott you weren't wrong." Said Joe, running his eyes all over Beth's body, as she stood there trying to hold her chin high and look strong, but the fear plain in her eyes.

"And she's just perfect for our little game here." He continued before turning to Daryl. "Now you see, we've been spending the best part of a couple'a years now picking up tail when we want it. We don't normally keep the likes of you - boyfriends, husbands, brothers - alive to watch, but me and the boys here are startin' to get a little bored." He gestured around at the other men. The larger man still had Beth restrained but she was still, aware of the gun still pointed at her head. Scott stood with his gun pointed at Daryl who knelt in between them all on the floor and the greasy haired man flanked Joe, who stood towards the centre of the group.

"Now don't get me wrong, while I love hearin' 'em scream while the boys get their fill, we thought we'd have a little fun with you, 'specially since you decided to go climbing all over the roof of our home 'n all." His large smile was replaced with a serious expression as he narrowed his eyes at Daryl.

Daryl felt every inch of his skin prickling as he took in the scene before him. He felt a heavy sickness in the pit of his stomach at where this was going and begun to feel a desperation creep into his veins.

"Fuck you." He spat. "If you fucking touch her -"

"You'll what?" Joe cut him off, staring at him as Daryl stared back, the rage emanating from his body and expression. "You'll what my friend? If I were you, I'd take a look 'round." He gestured around at the men standing staring at Daryl, before continuing. "Anyway. You didn't let me finish. To make things a little more interesting for the boys here, you got two options. You can watch us'all take it in turns to fuck your sweet little pet. Or, seen'as how we got no TV no more, we'll let you do it and we'll watch."

Daryl felt the blood drain from every part of him. He reacted on instinct, shouting angrily as he pushed himself to his feet and attempted to rip the gun out of Scott's hands. Just as he got purchase on it, he felt the searing hot pain of a crossbow connecting to the side of his face and he fell again to the floor, before feeling all the air knock out of him as his was kicked hard on his side and groin by the greasy haired man.

Daryl vaguely noted he could hear Beth's screams for the man to stop and all his mind could think was that he would do anything in the world to take the pain and fear he could hear in her cries.

"Now Len…" Joe's voice taunted through Daryl's clouded vision. "Whole pointa this game is he's meant'a be _alive._ " Daryl lay on his side and tried desperately focus his vision as Joe continued. "So what'll it be then? Your tail or our tail?"

Daryl tried to get onto his hands and knees and as his vision cleared, all he could see was Beth's face. She was staring down at him tears streaming down her face, looking at him with terror on her face but an expression that made him feel like she wanted to reach out to him.

He couldn't bear the look of fear and desperation and turned away from her, again noting the gun pointed back on him as he tried to pull himself up to look at Joe. He knew he needed to think smart to get them out of this but the anger and utter rage was coursing through the veins in his body.

Fixing Joe with the deadliest stare Beth had ever seen Daryl answered, "You can go to fucking hell. I swear I will tear you to fucking pieces, every fucking last one'a you if you touch her."

Joe's smile seemed to fall off his face at this and he stared back at Daryl thoughtfully for what felt like a lifetime.

"Wrong answer."

 **A/N - Elements of rape/non-con next chapter. Please skip on to chapter after once it's up. It is relevant for the plot!**


	15. Chapter 15

"Wrong answer." Joe said suddenly and it was as if it was the sign everyone was waiting for to move and before Daryl could even get a grip on what was happening, the man who had been holding a gun to Beth's head had dropped it now and had grabbed hold of her other arm, so she was restrained on both sides.

Len stepped towards Beth and as she screamed and struggled between the two men, he began trying to yank off her jeans.

Daryl lunged forward trying to grab him but was stuck again, hard across the face falling down again as he yelled.

"Get the fuck off her!" He roared, unable to keep the desperation out of his voice and his eyes wild as he realised the full horror of their situation.

While Daryl tried to pull himself once again, Beth screams grew louder and more desperate as she hopelessly struggled against the men who'd now stripped her down to her briefs and vest. Still trying to right himself again, Daryl could see through clouded vision Len stand in front of her, groping her breast while nuzzling her neck. He felt desperate and was willing his body to move but couldn't.

"Please!" Beth screamed. "Please tell us what to do! We'll do it! We'll do it, Daryl please!"

Joe laughed as Beth struggled against the men, before he looked back down at Daryl who was trying everything in his power to ignore the searing pain of his side and just fucking move.

"Well ' _Daryl'._ What'll it be? You gonna play?"

Daryl was on his knees, clutching painfully at one side with one hand while the other tried to push himself off the floor. His face was already started to swell and he could taste blood in his mouth.

"Daryl, please." Beth's voice pleading as she sobbed cut through his whole body like a knife making every part of him ache.

He looked up at her again and watched her suck in breathes and screw her eyes as she sobbed and tried to stretch her face away from Len.

He would give her anything in the world but she couldn't ask him to do this. But as he looked around at the leering men, he had no idea what to do. He needed to think of something, anything, but as much as he scrambled around in his mind, there was nothing.

"Tell me what to do." Daryl said quietly dropping his head towards the floor and wincing in pain as he did.

"I don't give a fuck any more about the game Joe, I wanna -" Len started, stepping forward angrily before Joe cut him off.

"I don't remember asking you what the fuck you want Len. We got our first players in our little game right here." Joe's deadly expression seemed to make Len stop in his tracks and stepped back staring furiously at Daryl as he did.

Daryl felt Joe grab him by the collar and he tried to properly get to his feet as he was dragged over to Beth and thrown onto the floor in front of her.

He stared down at her bare feet feeling a hollowness in his chest.

"Let's start nice and easy shall we? Why don't you show us all how you've been busy touchin' her little pussy?" Joe asked smiling, but with a serious darkness behind his eyes. The larger man who was holding one of Beth's arms started giggling in glee.

Daryl looked up at him with wild eyes, unable to hide the utter fear and horror that coursed through him. Joe only stared back at him, before Daryl dropped his head again.

"Can't." He rasped out, scrunching his eyes shut as if trying to shut it all away.

"'Can't'? 'Can't' … meaning you want _us_ to? Because ol' Len here'll be happy to get his fill if that's what'ya mean!" Joe asked, earning a smirk from Len.

"Daryl, please." Her quiet, small voice punctuated through the air and he hated how it didn't belong there, in all the horror around them. He couldn't bring himself to look at her at first, before he slowly glanced up at her looking down at him. The action made his side hurt as he moved.

She was still restrained by the men either side of her and she had a sad, pleading look in her eyes as the tears rolled silently down her face. Her voice shook as she continued; "Please Daryl. Not them."

Looking up at her, he hated everything. He hated that he had no weapon. He hated that she was no longer struggling. He hated that they didn't leave the cabin earlier, he hated the loft they'd stayed in that led the men to them and he hated the turn of the world; that meant innocent, kind and good people like Beth should end up stood here in a circle of men that deserved to be dead.

He looked down again at the ground and nodded, feeling his own eyes fill with tears.

He couldn't do this to Beth, he couldn't. But he couldn't let these animals hurt her. He felt like his entire body was coursing with despair.

Still sitting on the floor, he shut his eyes and dropped his head forward so his forehead rested on her knee. He squeezed his eyes shut as he reached out with his hand and held the shin of her other leg. Using it to guide him, he travelled his hand up her leg, feeling as he passed over her knee to her thigh.

As he reached the feel of her briefs he stopped. He couldn't do this, he thought. He couldn't fucking sit here and abuse Beth for the pleasure of these men.

"Please Daryl." Beth's quiet voice said through tears broke his thoughts.

He let himself look up at her again and this time, he saw utter resignation on her features. She stared at him with tears rolling down her cheeks and nodded.

He held behind the knee of her leg, rested his forehead against her knee again and felt the tears rolling down his own cheeks.

He couldn't do this. He couldn't. This was too much; he wouldn't hurt her. He wouldn't sit here and be the person who hurts her; who he's tried to protect her from. That was was it, he wouldn't. They were only going to push this further and further and he just couldn't. As gently as he could, he moved his hand away from Beth as he heard her whimpering above him.

Staring at Joe with tears streaming down his face, he couldn't shake the thickness and sadness in his voice as he answered him. "Go fuck yourself." His voice cracked before he'd even finished the sentence.

Joe's eyes narrowed at him and he stared for a beat longer.

"Alright then. Our tail. Time to teach him a lesson."

And before Daryl had even a chance to move or respond, something hard and sharp hit the side of his head causing him to fall to the floor. Every part of his body was suddenly being pounded with fists or kicks and he couldn't breathe through the searing pain. As everything begun to darken around him, the last thing he saw was Joe walking towards Beth as her screams faded out into silence.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N - Hello! I've taken out some of the OTT horror of the last chapter. I wanted to get Daryl to feel guilty, but think we can still achieve that without so much awfulness. I'm still not quite sure if there is an official way to do warnings (still new) but all I'd say is this is going to be pretty horrific/dark for a while with reference with what Beth has experienced.**

 _Walker_.

That was Daryl's first thought. There was just blackness, a strange heaviness through every muscle in his body, but also the unmistakable sound of a walker.

The noise around him slowly began to become clearer and he let his mind adjust to repetitive, slow thud, scrape and groan of the undead.

 _He should move_ , he thought. It sounded near, yet it didn't seem to be getting closer.

Still darkness and heaviness. He tried get his mind to tell his body to move. _Searing hot pain_.

He groaned. He became aware from the soft ground against his body that he was lying on his side.

 _Come on_ , he thought to himself as the constant thud and scrape began to grate on him.

Light. Not bright light, just the darkness taking on a softer glow. He willed his eyes to open.

A thin slither of brighter light and the stinging pain as he tried to open them wider.

A blurry haze of shadows gradually started to take shape.

 _Fuck, this hurts_. As if he was getting his senses back, he became aware that every part of him was pulsating with a sharp pain.

The haze begun to clear around him and he focussed on what he could see.

Eyes. Eyes staring right back at him, a few yards away from his face. He tried to move away but his whole body was heavy with pain. It was like all his muscles were beaten down to a pulp.

His eyes adjusted more and he realised he was staring right into Scott's eyes. Scott was lying on his side too, just a few feet away from Daryl. As Daryl took in the total stillness of the man's stare and the blood trickling down his face from his head, Daryl realised he was staring at a dead man.

Shit. ' _Scott'_. How did he know his name?

Suddenly, his mind was totally assaulted by images that made him want to throw up; it was like a slideshow of horror beaming across his mind. Waking up to the smell of smoke, the men in the morning mist, Beth standing there crying in nothing but her underwear, the man's laugh, the pain from what felt like hundreds of punches and kicks, Beth's screams as the man walked towards her.

He felt his insides hollow and he squeezed his eyes shut to try and shut it all out.

 _Beth._ Where was Beth? What the fuck had happened? Why had he not been able to help her?

He tried to open his eyes again and looked upwards, away from Scott's dead, soulless eyes.

The cabin. From where he was lying he could see the steps up to the porch and the blurry shadowed lines started to become the cabin.

He willed his eyes to focus and as his vision began to sharpen, that's when he saw her. Beth was sat on the porch, her back against the front of the cabin, knees drawn up to her body with her arms wrapped around them.

He took in her appearance and he felt like all the blood was draining from his body. She was just in her underwear, a fresh bruise had already formed on her face and a large shotgun lay in front of her. It was her expression that hit him so hard in his chest. She was just staring into the trees ahead with a hollowness to her eyes.

" _Beth._ " He croaked, trying to pull himself up onto his knees while every part of him protested painfully.

She glanced over sharply at him and gasped as if she wasn't expecting him to be there, before her look of shock turned to one of desperation.

" _Daryl?_ " She asked, as if she wasn't sure it was him.

He managed to finally pull himself up to standing, clutching his side which felt like a thousand knives were stabbing into it.

He surveyed the surroundings and struggled to get to grip with what he was seeing. Scott lay right by him on his side, a clear bullet wound to his head.

Further out towards the trees was the black man, face down in the direction of the woods, with a gruesome hole in the back of his head.

The large man was nearest the porch, lying flat on his stomach in a pool of blood with his hand stretched towards the steps as if reaching for Beth, her knife lying just before the first step.

As he looked around, his hearing centred in again on the thud, scrape and groan that seemed to be on repeat inside the house. He looked down at Beth again who hadn't moved, still hugging her legs but was staring up at him with tears rolling down her face.

He limped towards her and she followed his movements with her eyes but didn't move from where she sat.

Still clutching his side, he limped up the steps and squatted down in front of her.

" _Beth_." He said, unable to hide the worry and fear from his features. She seemed to look at him for a moment longer before looking down at the ground, with tears rolling down her face. "Beth what happened?"

She looked up again, staring straight ahead as a sudden coldness overtook her expression.

"He's still alive in there." At her words he felt chills run through his body, glancing sharply up at the door to the cabin, wondering if she was referring to the noise that was obviously that of the walker.

As if reading his mind, Beth answered in the same cold voice. "Not him. _Him_. He's alive. Won't come out."

He stared at her and he felt the burning fire of rage spread through every part of his body. His whole expression darkened and his eyes narrowed, his gaze hardening as he stared at her.

Without another word, ignoring every bit of pain he felt in his muscles, he stood immediately, took five purposeful steps across the porch to the stairs where he scooped up Beth's abandoned knife.

Turning and in a few steps, he yanked the cabin door open, channelling every bit of rage he felt inside him into his actions. The door swung open and hit the cabin wall with a bang that seemed to echo off the trees. Stepping into the front room, his hardened stare immediately zoned in on the walker who was further up the corridor towards the end of the cabin. It spun immediately at the noise and Daryl recognised the grey mop of hair as the man Joe. He had a number of clear stab wounds on his chest, a knife still sticking out of one of the wounds, with the blood still bright red and wet down his front. As it ambled towards Daryl, he stepped quickly towards it and drove his knife hard into it's head.

He shoved it out of his way onto the floor before his narrowed eyes zoned in on the closed bedroom door. Striding purposefully towards it he flung it open.

His eyes immediately found Len, who was slumped on the floor, his back against the bed.

His jeans were around his ankles and he was clutching a visible wound that was on his shoulder, while blood seemed to be pumping out of another on his arm. He was surrounded by a pool of his own blood.

His eyes immediately looked up and connected with Daryl's; a look of horror initially crossing his features before it turned into a furious scowl.

"That fucking bitch." He coughed up blood as he spoke. "Stabbed me with my own fucking knife."

His mouth twisted into a sneer as he looked Daryl in the eye before continuing; "But hell, she fucking screamed -"

Daryl didn't wait for him to finish. He grabbed him by the hair, yanked his head back and slit his throat.

As Len clutched at the wound and spluttered and coughed, Daryl crouched down in front of him and through the his dark and deadly eyes, he watched.

When Len's spluttering came to an end, Daryl didn't hesitate to stab him sharply in the head before he stood.

What he'd just done did nothing to make him feel better and he felt overwhelmingly sick at what Len had said about Beth. _What the fuck had they done to her?_

Giving Len's body one last furious stare, he walked out of the bedroom and back outside to the porch. He immediately felt his emotions shift from pure rage to fear and pain as he took in Beth's fragile and withdrawn form, sitting in the same position as he left her.

He crouched down quietly beside her and as gently as he could, he touched her forearm. She was crying, the tears flowing quickly down her face as she tried to bury her head into her knees.

"Beth." He tried again. He could hear the pain and fear in his own voice.

All of a sudden, she turned sharply and looked directly at him. The sudden fierceness of her expression and wildness in her eyes made him want to recoil into himself and disappear.

"You couldn't do it Daryl." She said looking desperately and furiously at him.

He felt like he'd been physically slapped by her words and his blood went cold. She stared at him a beat longer, watching as his expression changed to utter shame, before she buried her head into her knees again and cried.

Daryl felt an aching sorrow through every single part of his body and he looked back at her desperately.

"Beth I -" She turned again and stared at him, her wild eyes pinning him with her expectant gaze.

He didn't even know how to finish and he had to turn away, staring at the floor with shame prickling through every part of his body. This was his fucking fault. He couldn't protect her. These animals had done something to her and it was his fucking fault.

It felt like somebody was squeezing his chest together and the hurt overwhelmed him. He couldn't have done what they asked. He knew he couldn't have. But would it have kept Beth safe? Had he made a fucking terrible mistake that let these men do something awful to her?

Hanging his head in shame he nodded slightly, feeling sick at himself. He felt like he didn't deserve to have woken up. He failed her in the most spectacular way.

He glanced up and her and took in her tiny fragile form. She needed someone right now. Someone to comfort her, support her and know what to say. He couldn't do any of those things but he couldn't leave her. No matter how she hated him and how much she'd be better off without him; he could never leave her.

He got up silently, wincing in pain as he did and tread carefully over to the clearing where her jeans and shirt lay abandoned. Picking them up, he walked over to her and lay them gently in front of her. She didn't even look up.

"Gonna get our stuff." Daryl said quietly, averting his eyes before going back into the house.

 _Fuck. What the hell had he done?_ He began gathering up their stuff and stared for a moment at the body of Joe in the living room. He wanted him to come back to life so he could kill him again.

Despite being momentarily distracted, his ears immediately pricked up at the rasping from outside. He quickly walked out and found Beth standin on the porch, now dressed but making no effort to move or do anything as she stared vacantly at the three walkers approaching through the clearing. They dropped at the body of the first man and began viciously tearing it to pieces. He glanced sideways at her and felt a hollowness inside him at her empty expression as she watched.

As he did, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that it seemed like the woods seemed to be swaying. Focusing now, he realised that the movement was hundreds and hundreds of bodies. One of the biggest herds he'd ever seen was streaming towards them. His stomach dropped.

" _Shit_ , we gotta go Beth." He grabbed her hand and went to turn and run through the house out the back. As he did though she didn't move and he spun around trying to read her face and understand what was stopping her.

He stared at her as she just stared down at his hand where he held her hand. For a horrible sickening second he thought she'd rather stay and face the walkers than be stuck with him. She hated him that much. But he couldn't let her.

"Beth." He said urgently now. "We gotta go now." While the bodies strewn in the clearing seemed to work as a distraction to them, a few of the walkers had now spotted them.

"Please." He said desperately when she didn't respond.

Finally, she glanced up at his face, her cheeks still wet with tears and nodded, before following him through the cabin and out into the woods.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N - So sorry for the funny formatting - not sure what happened there but should be fixed! Just a quick note to say this is my first fic and while I wrote it just for myself, I decided on a whim I'd have a go at publishing it and it's lovely that people are up for reading it too. The reviews and follows are insanely encouraging and if it weren't for them, I would have just taking it offline for myself so thank you. Anyway, just wanted to say I had a go at sketching out a full plot, so (I think!) we won't be dragged through the misery of all this for too long - other things need to happen to keep me enjoying writing it too so thanks for sticking with it anyhow!**

Daryl hated himself. He felt sick and disgusted at who he was and felt like if it wasn't for the added guilt of leaving Beth on her own, he would have walked into a herd of walkers by now.

He didn't know whether it was better or worse that Beth hated him too. He was glad she hated him, because he'd failed her miserably and he wouldn't be able to take it if she was kind to him. But she hated him. And that made his heart ache like he'd never ever felt before.

After running into the woods for what felt like miles and miles, they finally lucked out - if you could call it that - when Daryl spotted a ladder to a small hunting perch in the trees. They clambered up there and sat side by side watching as hundreds of walkers swarmed beneath them.

But they didn't sit side by side out of choice, it was only a small perch and there was nowhere else to go.

He knew it wasn't choice because of the way Beth held herself. She was rigid and it was if his skin was made of fire because she held herself as far away from him as possible. She stared right ahead and he couldn't fucking bear the hollowness in her stare. He didn't fully appreciate until now that one of the things about Beth was she had this incredible brightness to her eyes. He didn't fully realise it until now, when it was gone.

Daryl was never a talker, never good at saying how he felt, never good at communicating how fucking sorry he was and how he'd do anything in his power to go back there and change _something_ so whatever the hell happened to her didn't and she could go back to being the beautiful, sunshine Beth that he'd come to care for more than his own life.

But he wasn't a talker, so he sat there in silence, watching the walkers below him, hanging his head in shame at how much he'd really failed her and hurt her.

Again for what felt like the millionth time he played the scene through his mind. He imagined giving in to the men, touching Beth and hurting her, being the reason her eyes hollowed out now and her silence burned through the air. Would they have stopped at that? Would they have made him do more? If they did, would that have been enough? Would they have really just walked away and that woulda been the end of it? He didn't know.

Thinking back, it wasn't like he made the choice - him or them. He wasn't thinking straight and was so full of rage and fear and shame all he could think was that he wouldn't abuse Beth. What happened next, he guess he should have known, but maybe there was a small fucking stupid part of him that thought they'd find a way out still.

All he did know is he'd fucked everything up and most of all, he'd let something truly awful happen to her.

He had no idea what happened, but he could guess and the thought of it had the world spinning with rage and horror and he had to clench his jaw and squeeze his eyes shut to stop him from fucking losing it.

On top of all of that, she'd had to kill people. He had no idea what the hell had happened, but there wasn't anyone else there, so it must have been her. Being out here for so long together, they'd talked at length about how one day she might have to do it to protect herself. That was part of the reason he was training her; so that if there was ever the choice, she'd choose her. But what made him recoil into himself now is that during those chats he silently listened while she'd talked and talked about if it came to it, whether she really could it. She'd told him she thought he was brave and strong that he'd been able to do it to protect them, but she didn't know if she ever could and what it would do to her afterwards if she did. Beth being Beth, she made sure it never came across that she thought him a bad person for being able to do it - instead she'd talk about how it made her weak that the act of killing someone could well destroy her.

So he knew, whatever else she was dealing with, she was carrying that too.

He looked at her out of the corner of his eye again and for a split second he imagined what would happen if he pulled her into his arms, comforted her and told her over and over again how damn sorry he was. But he didn't and he looked back down at the walkers, hating himself, hating his failures and hating his inability to do anything - even now - for Beth.

Eventually, he saw her head start to bob and jerk and he realised she was trying to stay awake, despite her utter exhaustion.

"Got watch." He said quietly, looking at her out of the corner of his eye.

She said nothing, didn't even look his way, before she shifted herself back slightly and lay down, curled up into a ball on her side.

He sat stock still, watching the walkers below him, listening to her quiet, muffled sobs and tried desperately to think of what he could do to help make things right. How the fuck could she be stuck with him, of all people, right now. Stuck with the one person who failed her.

He thinks eventually she fell asleep, but it was fitful; she whimpered, cried and kicked around and every time he felt like he should wake her from her nightmare she seemed to wake herself up and he'd listen to her cry again.

Eventually, she sat back up and, looking at her out of the corner of his eye again, he had to cringe at how awful she looked. The bruise was fully formed on the left side of her face and she'd never looked so drained and weak. He had to turn away from her, her face a sad and sorrowful reminder of how much he'd truly failed her.

"Got it." She said so quietly he barely heard her while she stared straight ahead.

"Nah, I'm good." He answered. Even though he was useless, hopeless and was totally unable to comfort her, he couldn't sleep even if he wanted to and the thought of leaving her alone to her thoughts made his chest ache.

She said nothing in response, continuing to stare into the distance.

He knew he was shitty with words, he knew she hated him and he knew he hated himself but he needed to do something to try. He needed to say something comforting or just anything other than this silence with her lost in her own head.

"Beth I - " he started, still not quite sure where he was going to go.

"Don't." She cut him off before he'd even had a chance to think. She said it so sharply but painfully, it felt like it cut through him and he felt hollow inside.

He nodded slightly and looked back down at the ground wishing with every fiber of his being that he could go back to that clearing and kill them all.

As neither of them slept, there was no real point in waiting until the morning so at first light, with Daryl making sure the herd had completely passed, they clambered down to the ground. As they walked throughout the day with a vague purpose of finding shelter, Beth was silent beside him and he walked with his crossbow in his hands, shoulders hunched feeling every bit of guilt and shame he'd felt the day before.

He was worried about Beth. She'd said nothing and was totally lost in her head, with pain written on her face as she stared at the ground. He thought for the millionth time how he needed to do or say something but he was no good. No good to her, no good to anyone. The guilt plagued him.

As he let his mind be consumed by it, he heard the familiar sound of walkers and welcomed the noise to break the silence that had become deafening. He raised his crossbow and tried to count with his ears how many before he saw them.

Stumbling from the woods in front of him came three, along with two from the left and two to the right. This was nothing they couldn't handle before and while he took the first few out with his bolts as they neared them, he noticed with an unease in his chest that Beth hadn't reacted, hadn't even moved to grab her knife.

"Beth." He said urgently, his eyes darting to look at her before going back to the sightline of his bow. He shot the final one in front of him before quickly turning to see the two coming from her direction were close now and she had still done nothing but stare emptily at them as they approached her.

" _Beth._ " He said panicked now and spinning to face her to take out the two coming towards her. He managed to shoot one with his bow before the other one got too close and he grabbed his knife from his holster and stepped towards her.

Just as he managed to strike the last one hard into it's head, he felt a gruesome clawing on his shoulder and was pulled back by one of the two who had been approaching him from his side.

He fell to the ground underneath one and the motion seemed to finally snap Beth into action. She gasped, grabbed her knife out of the holster and slammed the one still standing hard into it's head.

While Daryl scrambled underneath the other one, he felt the immediate release of pressure as Beth grabbed it, yanking it off him before slamming the knife into its head with a wildness in her eyes.

He stood immediately, bent over with his hands on his knees from the exertion of holding it off him while Beth stood upright, holding the dripping knife in her hand and gasping for air.

She seemed to suddenly be struggling to breathe and her expression changed to one of panic as she begun to start gulping air down, just as tears began to stream down her face.

He immediately stood and walked to stand in front of her, reaching to touch her arm. As he did, she jerked away suddenly and forcefully, a wildness in eyes as she did.

"Beth." He started softly as if she was wild animal he was trying to calm down. No idea what he was going to say but knowing he needed to say something. "Beth, I can't help you if -" Before he could even finish she cut him off.

"'Can't'?" She said suddenly and for the first time in what felt like a lifetime, was now looking directly at him. He was pinned by the fiery rage of her gaze and her eyes seemed to burn into his soul making him want to shrink into himself.

"You ' _can't_ '?!" She said again and her wild and desperate expression made him want to look away. His eyes fell to the ground and his shoulders hunched further as Beth seemed to be be getting louder. The word gave him a horrible prickling sensation in his skin as it took him back to the clearing, back to his own fucking stupid words that caused Beth's pain.

"You ' _can't'_ or you WON'T Daryl?! Which is it?" She asked, looking wildly at him now and he felt himself wanting to recoil.

"Please Beth -" He tried, feeling desperate.

"Why couldn't you Daryl?" She seemed to be closer to him now as she asked the question he'd been asking himself in his head every second for the last 24 hours. She was staring expectantly at him, the fire burning in her eyes. Her whole face was twisted in anger.

"You were fine with me in that loft, in the cabin, but when I needed you -" Her voice cracked and her tears began to stream. "When I needed you, you couldn't. Am I really that awful Daryl? You're repulsed by me _that much_? Enough so that you couldn't even bring yourself to do somethin' that'd stop them?" She asked crying now. "Was it all just nothin', just some sick game so that when it actually came to it - hell when it came to it which also meant you'd stop those, those…" - she seemed to look panicked as she tried name them - "... from hurtin' me, you couldn't even do _somethin'_?!"

As her voice rose and she sobbed out the end of her sentence, she tried her best to stare defiantly at him. Beth was angry and hurt and horrified. Her anger was right in this moment the only way she could process how utterly hurt and devastated she felt at the horror of the last day. She knew in her heart she was being so cruel, she knew Daryl would have rather have killed himself than hurt her, but right now she hated him because she needed to hate something. She needed to feel another emotion which wasn't fear or the hollowness that was now overtaking her.

Daryl knew she was finally reacting and he knew he should be comforting her, telling her how sorry he was. But instead he was overwhelmed by what she was thinking and what she was clearly also holding inside her now, eating away at her soul and her spirit along with everything else this had caused. He desperately needed her to understand, to let this - of all things - be something she wouldn't let eat away at her.

"Is that what you think?" He said facing her, eyes dangerous and voice rising. "You think I'm _repulsed by you_? That I was playing some sick fucking game?" He asked, feeling utter hatred for himself that not only was she trying to cope with what happened, she'd also convinced herself that he'd been unable to do anything because of how he felt about her.

"You have no fucking idea what I think about you." He spat, hating that he felt rage emanating off him when his mind was telling him he should be comforting her. "No fucking idea of how I've been drivin' myself out of my _fucking mind_ for weeks thinking about you. Couldn't even get near you without thinkin' somethin' and going fuckin' crazy with it. So don't you fuckin' dare let this be another thing you're carrying in your mind Beth. After all that shit that you gotta deal with, don't go carrying this shit around too. Because course I fucking want you." He bit out the last sentence, feeling none of the embarrassment or shame he would if he was saying this in any other situation other than this one, where it was so important that he made her see. "But not like that Beth. Jesus fucking Christ Beth, not like that."

He had got square up in her face and felt as if all the energy was draining away from him as he finished. He turned away now from her now, staring at the floor and desperately trying to control his own emotions. Beth stood still with tears streaming down her face.

"Well you made a choice." She said quietly, still with tears and a look of hurt on her face. "They gave you a choice and you made one that never shoulda been yours to make."

He felt like his whole body was empty. Like there was nothing left of him and he was just some useless shell.

"I know." He said quietly, looking sorrowfully at the ground. "If I could take it all back I would. Couldn't fuckin' hurt you Beth. But if I woulda known they woulda hurt you, I would have done anythin'. I shoulda done whatever they wanted if it woulda meant keepin' you safe. Was fuckin' stupid. Just thought I was keepin' you safe from me and that was all I could think." He hung his head in shame as he finished quietly.

She seemed to stare at him for a lifetime before finally turning away, nodding slightly as she did. She picked up her knife which she'd dropped during the argument and stared at him again expectantly.

There was no forgiveness and there was no warmth in her eyes. She only stared waiting, letting him know she was ready to go.

He stared back through the slits of his eyes, wondering if he should try and say more. Eventually, he nodded slightly and turned, Beth following him hunched over and staring at the ground as she did.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N - Sorry for the late update. Had a few messages and comments about the story not being right/going in the direction and it put me off posting publicly and I went back to writing for myself! However, I've realised I'm being a wimp - it's never going to be right for everyone and even if one person enjoys it then I'm happy!**

 **I know if your writing is good enough you should never need to do what I'm about to do now and explain the thinking behind the plot - but for those who were unhappy with Daryl's actions that meant he chose 'them' over 'him', after watching him on the show react to Negan which ultimately caused Glenn's death, I think it didn't seem out of character to see that impulsiveness in him, where he can't quite see past what's happening right there in front of him. In this story here I don't think he ever saw it as a choice, just that his immediate objective was to not hurt Beth. Sorry if it felt out of character though, should hopefully improve with the story I have planned! :)**

Two days of total silence. There had been the groans of walkers, the crunch of leaves underfoot and the chirps of an occasional bird but all of that seemed to only enhance the silence Beth and Daryl were surrounded in.

Daryl was starting to wonder whether he'd recognise his own voice if he spoke he hadn't heard it for so long. But it wasn't his own voice he wanted to hear and he hated that after their argument she'd gone back to emptiness, both in her expression and in her silence.

He stared across the fire at her where they'd set up camp in a small clearing in the woods. He'd set up their tent like the last few nights although hadn't slept in it, instead gesturing for her to take it and had sat outside staring at the door, willing the old Beth to come out of it again.

They had wandered aimlessly the last few days, neither of them wanting to get anywhere near a town but finding nothing in the woods that would do as a shelter.

The nights were getting colder and he noticed that night with a clench of his jaw that there was a slight tremble to Beth as she sat.

She seemed to look up at him at that moment and he quickly schooled his features before turning away.

He couldn't bear to look at her. Couldn't deal with the hollow look in her eyes and time had done nothing to lessen his feelings of guilt and pain at what he'd let happen. He stared back into the fire and let his mind wander to times 'before' when they'd sat just like this and he'd been unable to shut her up as she peppered him with questions about his past. Fuck, he missed that so much his chest ached.

He wished their family was there. He wished Maggie could comfort her, Rick would have a plan for what to do next and somebody would let him have it; tell him that he'd failed and that he was worthless to the group. He wished for that because it was true and he needed to hear it.

"He was distracted." Her tiny, quiet voice felt loud in his ears and made his head snap up in shock at the sudden intrusion in the silence.

With the flames from the fire dancing across her face, her eyes connected with his.

She was looking at him with sad distant eyes as he stared back at her.

"' _Len_.'" She said his name as if it was poison and her face curled into a grimace.

"The other one, the leader, said Len got to go first." She looked down at the ground and Daryl sat stock still staring at her. He felt like he was holding his breath and his head started swimming.

"Him and Joe dragged me to the bedroom." She paused before looking up at him. "I knew what they were planning. I knew what they were going to do." She said, looking almost defiant with her chin raised, as if having that knowledge put her in control.

He swallowed. He didn't want to hear this. He didn't want to know what was coming next. The thought of it made his blood run cold and his head swim even more. But he needed to. He needed to be there for her and if that's what it meant, he would be here and listen.

"And he said Len got to go first." She said again, swallowing the shake in her voice as she did.

"He said that Len got to go first because _he_ wanted to deal with you. Wanted to get you up, bring you back around then make you watch. And after, he was gonna kill you." Her voice trembled and Daryl couldn't help his eyes narrow, his whole expression turning dangerous as he tried to control his rage.

"It was that Daryl. Wasn't that they were gonna… wasn't what they were gonna do to me. Was what they were gonna do to you. I woulda been weak. Cried while they did what they wanted. But not if they were gonna hurt you." She was staring at him intensely now, her expression hard and he stared back, through the slits of his eyes, his expression unreadable.

"Realised then that I _could_ kill. After everything we talked about. I could be brave like you. I could kill for you just like you did for me." Her voice softened at the end and he _almost_ , just almost saw a glimpse of the Beth he knew before, before her expression changed again, this time taking on a haunted look and she turned quickly to face the ground.

"He wasn't gonna wait though for me to think about what to do." She paused and seemed to gulp as she closed her eyes.

"There was nothing really I could do." She continued. "Until there was." She scrunched her eyes shut but not before tears slipped out and rolled down her cheeks.

"Left his knife on the side while he... while he...he was distracted by what he was doing. Obviously thought I was too weak or stupid to realise." She stared at him as if waiting for him to agree. Daryl couldn't say anything or respond. He felt like everything inside him was on fire. The rage burned through his skin and he felt like it was taking everything in his power to sit completely still and keep looking at her, while his whole body was telling him to get up and destroy something. Underneath it though, he felt another emotion that was clawing at his heart. Every part of him ached for his incredible, kind Beth who'd gone through fucking hell and he felt raw with her pain.

"So I stabbed him." She said simply.

"And when he tried to grab me I stabbed him again in the arm. I didn't wait; I went straight out to the front room as Joe was coming through the door to see what was happening." Her mouth twisted into a sneer. "He definitely thought I was a stupid weak little girl as he didn't see it coming at all. Got me to the floor but I didn't stop until he was dead."

She seemed to be trying to control her breathing as she continued. Daryl still stared at her intently, saying nothing and giving nothing away on his face.

"Got Joe's gun and then it was easy. I shot them all." She raised her chin again defiantly as if waiting for him to challenge her.

"Fuckers got what they deserved." His voice was quiet and deadly as he spoke, his eyes hard on her across the fire. He knew he should be saying something comforting, but the rage was pumping through his veins still and he couldn't think about anything else other than how much he wanted to go back and kill them all himself.

She looked thoughtfully at him for a moment before continuing more softly. "Everything I did, I was able to do because you taught me how Daryl. I shot those three men from the porch before they'd even had a chance to raise their guns. You made me learn how'ta shoot. I killed those… those men in the house because you showed me how'ta use my knife. They thought I was weak. Probably thought I'd just take it and curl up and die. But you made me strong. I wasn't another dead girl. You made me wanna live Daryl." Her voice trembled, but she spoke louder, a defiance in the strength of her voice.

" _Stop._ " He said softly turning towards the ground, unable to understand how she could be finding a way to give him credit when he fucking failed her. He felt sick inside at everything she'd told him. His mind burned of the image of her going through all of that alone, the terror she must have felt as she fought for her life and for him. He hated that he'd ever put her in that position where she had to make that choice.

"Beth." He paused, thinking carefully about what he was going to say now she was finally willing to listen. "I'm a worthless piece of shit. Those fuckin' animals deserved everything they got. But you never shoulda had to. Couldn' even keep you safe." He shook his head as he looked away, still trying to work out how to fully explain how his blind stupid rage at the time led him to fail her so miserably. "Did the worst thing I could'a. Was too fucking blind too see what was gonna happen." He muttered he last sentence more to himself than to her, his deep sad frown enhanced by the self-disgust in his averted eyes.

Staring at him like she was considering something, she eventually shook her head.

"They never woulda stopped Daryl." She said quietly looking at the ground. "Woulda made you… made you hurt me in the worst way. Destroy us - our partnership - and who we are. Still done whatever they wanted to me. Then they woulda killed us." She looked at him as if trying to read him. "You know that right? Wouldn'a made a damn bit of difference." She finished sadly.

He stared at her intensely, his heart feeling heavy at how after everything she'd been through she could be so strong and willing to forgive.

"Don't deserve to be stuck with me Beth." He said shaking his head, looking at the ground before staring at her again, eyes burning into her. "But there ain't nobody else. And I swear to fucking god Beth, won't let my head get in the way of keepin' you safe. Won't let nuthin' get in the way of keepin' you safe." He growled, the darkness and hardness of his stare pinning her where she sat.

She stared back, considering him for a second before she seemed to decide something and went to stand. His eyes followed her as she walked round the fire and went to crouch in front of him.

As she did, he noticed her grimace painfully and grip her stomach.

"Beth?" He asked uncertainly and begun to reach out for her.

"S'nuthin'." She said quickly and before he could really think what he was doing, he grabbed her hand as she went to stand. He stood with her and as he did, he lifted her shirt slightly before she could stop him.

He felt his jaw involuntary clench as his sight was greeted with the cut from the fight with the desperate couple just a few days ago, but what was a shallow wound was now surrounded by an angry red swelling and a thick liquid seeping ominously from it.

"Shit." He said before he could stop himself. Glancing back up at her face, she was looking away from him with a guilty yet resigned expression on her face.

With his other hand he gently touched her shoulder, suddenly hit by how much he'd missed having her so near and not flinching away from his every touch or look.

"You alright?" He asked ever so softly, in the voice that used to only be reserved for Judith before she … before whatever it was that happened to her.

Beth looked up into his eyes and he didn't miss the haunted look that crossed her features.

"I… I don't wanna go to a town Daryl." She said timidly, looking away again as if embarrassed by her confession.

He felt his expression hardened. He knew an infected wound when he saw one, hell he'd had enough of his own, but he also recognised the all too familiar look of a vulnerable woman who was afraid.

He quickly realised from her admission that she already knew she was in trouble but finding a town to find medication, and risking coming across people again, was what terrified her the most.

He turned sharply away from her, walking purposefully over to their packs and picked up the first one, not bothering to be careful as he pulled out their meagre belongings.

"Daryl." She said quietly. "Daryl, there's nothing from the first aid kit for this. Already checked."

He ignored her, going through the second pack with an edge to his searching now, beginning to feel the growing unease in his stomach as he started mentally working out how long she had before things started to become very serious.

Finding nothing, he threw the pack on the ground with more force than necessary. He walked over to her again and had to pause for a second to get his tension under control before raising his hand gently to her forehead.

She looked nervously up at him as his expression darkened further as he felt the unnaturally hot yet clammy skin under his touch.

He pulled his hand back, stepping sharply away from her and pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes.

"Fuck!" He shouted loudly. No sooner had he promised to keep her safe, she was in trouble and he felt panic rising in him at his lack of control in the situation. He needed to do something and he needed to do it fast.

Dropping his hands, he felt his resolve hardened.

"We need meds Beth." He turned to her, needing to get across to her how urgent her situation was.

"This could get bad. I ain't gonna let nuthin' happen to you. But I need to get meds." He tried to keep his voice soft and steady but felt the impatience and rising panic coming across. He needed to convince her but was already feeling like they were running out of time and his thoughts came out jumbled and stuttered as he rushed to find a solution. "Doesn't have to be a proper town, but somewhere… somewhere with houses, few stores… maybe something that might not have been picked over completely… a mall or school or somethin' - "

"Please Daryl." Beth looked at him desperately. "No towns Daryl. I can't… no towns. No schools. No people."

He looked at her and his heart ached for her. His strong, confident Beth was all but disappeared and he couldn't shake the horrible feeling of familiarity, hearing his mother's voice as she begged him not to upset his father.

He looked at her as his mind scrambled around what to do.

"We'll find somewhere today for you to hole up in. Won't be long but if we make sure it's safe and secure, I'll be gone for just a few hours - "

"No Daryl." Beth cut in even louder and more desperate than before, her hand gripping his vest with the fear and panic plain on her face. "No Daryl. We don't separate." She searched his face. "Not now. Not after everything." She finished resolutely.

He looked down at her and felt like his heart was going to explode with how much he cared for her. He hated that she was so vulnerable and felt almost dizzy with fear that she was getting sick. He would do anything she asked but he needed to keep her safe.

Staring back at her for another moment, before finally, he gave a small sharp nod.

"Ain't goin' nowhere, Beth." He stared at her as he watched her features soften in relief. "We'll figure something out."


	19. Chapter 19

In the whole year that they'd been without their group, Daryl had never wanted Rick more than he did now.

Daryl never wanted to be a leader. A decision-maker. He'd always been a follower and had always chosen assholes to follow.

But then one day he met Rick and all of a sudden, he found someone who he didn't just want to follow, he wanted to listen to. He respected Rick; trusted him to make the decisions that were right for the group. Sure, people had started to ask Daryl for his opinion at the prison but he always knew that Rick had the final call and over time, that had started to make him feel secure enough to voice his own thoughts. Because ultimately, if he'd messed up, Rick would be there to fix it.

But right now, there was no Rick. Daryl didn't even know if he was alive anymore. And now here he was, desperate to make the right call that was starting to become a life or death situation for the person he cared about more than anyone else in the world.

The plan he made was simple; abide by Beth's wishes by not looking for meds in a town, instead picking over every lonely cabin, petrol station or campsite they came across off the beaten track. But while he wanted to stick by his word to her, there was also no way in hell he was going to let her die because of it. So his plan was to stick to the woods, but while heading in the direction of a large town the map told him was about ten miles North of where they currently were.

His thinking was that if they didn't find anything with plan A, and if Beth started to get real sick, they were already on the way to somewhere he was sure would have something for her.

What he'd only now come to realise, as they picked over yet another already ransacked lonely cabin, was that people got sick much quicker from an infection than he thought.

He watched Beth struggling as she searched through empty cabins, feeling a terrible unease in the pit of his stomach at her sluggish actions and her shortness of breath. She was getting really sick. Her skin was a sallow yellow and the sheen of sweat on her forehead seemed out of place with the winter chill he felt.

After pulling out pointless cleaning products from the kitchen sink, she stood suddenly and had to grip the counter to stop herself from falling over as the dizziness overwhelmed her.

"Woah." Daryl stepped forward immediately, gripping her elbow gently to steady her. "You alright Greene?" He asked softly, a question he already knew the answer to.

"M'fine. Just lost my balance is all." She answered faintly, looking away from him as if knowing he would read the lie in her eyes.

He stared at her, his face blank, before he gave a small nod and stepped away.

Shit, he was gonna fail her. He promised to keep her safe and he was going to fuck up again. They needed meds and they needed them fast.

He couldn't offer words of support or say anything remotely positive, his mouth pressed into a thin line as he searched the last room in the cabin and, as he already knew he would, came up empty again.

As he moved back to the corridor, he looked to Beth in the kitchen as she stood there gripping her stomach, her eyes pinched shut in a painful grimace.

His fists clenched and his eyes narrowed as he felt the heaviness of dread over come him. She was getting really fucking sick and there was nothing he could do to help her. Suddenly realising he was there, she quickly straightened herself and looked away guiltily.

"No luck?" She asked with a sad smile, already knowing the answer.

He stared at her grimly before shaking his head. Looking at the ground he walked solemnly past her out the door, hating that every time they searched and found nothing, they were running out of time. Listening to make sure she was following, he walked into the woods, shoulders hunched, without looking back.

In answer to the question he kept asking himself, it turns out it was just a few more hours before Beth was in real trouble. They were closer to the town, but not close enough when Beth, who for the last mile had been propped up by Daryl as they walked, finally lost her footing and could no longer get herself back up. Collapsing into the leaves, her limbs suddenly went limp and her eyes fluttered shut.

" _Beth._ " Daryl said urgently, kneeling down beside her and gently shaking her shoulder.

"Beth. Shit _Beth_." He said again, the desperation creeping into his voice as her head seemed to roll to the side as she tried to respond to him.

"Fuck!" Daryl felt his heart thudding as he looked down at her pale and pained face. He needed to do something and he felt panic rising in him at his helplessness to save her.

"Please Beth." He begged, looking at her searchingly as if she was suddenly going to get up. Trying to control his feeling of desperation and urgency, he lifted her into his arms as gently as he could and rose to his feet, feeling the urge to squeeze her tightly to him. As he did she stirred and groaned by her eyes still didn't open.

As he strode purposefully, clutching her to him, despair started to overcome him as his mind frantically worked out how far they still had to go before they got to a town.

"No fucking way Beth." He said through clenched teeth more to himself than her stirring form, as he started to feel all of the hope inside him draining away. "No fucking way. Not after everything. No fucking way."

He tried desperately to stop his emotions from clouding his mind as his thoughts scrambled frantically around for something, _anything,_ he could do.

He looked down at her again and had to squeeze his eyes shut to try and shut out the image of her helpless and weak in his arms. She was going to fucking die. She was going to fucking _die_ right in his arms because he was too fucking useless to save her. And if she died the sun might as well crash and burn up in the sea because all the light and warmth in the world would die with her. He wouldn't live in some fucked up world without her. He _couldn't_ live in a world without her. She had become everything to him and he tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall as he even imagined it.

He needed a new plan. Fuck, he needed Rick. He needed someone who was worth something; someone who'd know what to do to help them. As his mind searched wildly around for answers, he tried to imagine what Rick would do if he was here.

He would go ransack a hospital or surgery to get Beth help. But Daryl couldn't do that with her in his arms; he'd never make it. He needed to go without her. He felt almost dizzy with the thought of it. But as he looked down at her, he realised it was his last and only option to keep her alive.

He needed somewhere safe where she could stay; he'd be no more than an hour, running there and back and smashing through any doctors surgeries, vets, hospitals he could find.

To fucking hell with anyone who tried to get in his way or stop him.

As his mind started jerkingly trying to piece together a plan and scramble about for where he might find some kind of shelter for her, something incredible happened.

The trees started to thin out and right there in front of them was a small church, not unlike the one he and Beth had stayed in a few weeks ago. Same back window, same stepped entrance and a fenced yard, although this one was much lower, doing nothing than providing a decorative edging to the boundary.

 _Faith._ He thought, looking down at the precious cargo in his arms.

Suddenly feeling very aware that by carrying Beth, it would be difficult to get to his bow on his back, he let his senses take control. He studied the church for signs of movement and listened for the groans or scrapes of walkers inside.

Feeling at least partly confident that there was nothing there, he stepped silently into the clearing and walked quickly round to the back window.

This was a leap of faith and he felt oddly like he was trusting Beth's belief in the world to guide him to safety.

Still with Beth in his arms, he peered carefully in the window and felt a wave of relief wash over him as he took in the empty building. He could do this, he felt optimistically. He could set her down somewhere hidden, get to the town, get the help she needs and be back before things get worse. She would get better, she would be OK. _They_ would be OK.

He took two stairs at a time up to the front doors and gave them a hard kick as they flung open. He was suddenly struck by how lucky it was that he'd stumbled across somewhere that was so similar to where they'd been before, because he immediately knew where he could leave Beth and know confidently she wouldn't be found by walker or man.

He strode purposely towards the back office, his tread silent and Beth steady but restless in his arms. Laying her gently on the office desk, his eyes darted around as he searched for a crawl space similar to where they'd hidden in the past.

But as always in this fucked up world, Daryl's luck seemed to run out.

Just when he spotted the unnatural wideness of the wood grain in one corner of the room, he heard something that made it feel like all the blood drained out of his body.

Voices.

They were quiet and hushed but judging by how well he could hear them, he realised as a prickly heat ran over his body that they were very close. Moving stealthily on his feet he pressed his back to the wall next to the window and tried to carefully peer out without being seen. He felt every muscle in his body taut with tension.

Sure enough, coming out of the woods into the clearing were two men, both armed.

Seeing them, he was struck by an overwhelming sense of rage and nauseousness as his mind transported him to the horrors of the cabin. He hated them immediately, hearing the taunts and jeering of that day all around him.

He felt his whole body twitch with how much he wanted to go out there and rip their heads off. He already knew what they would do if he let them anywhere near Beth and there was no fucking way he was taking his chances.

But while his emotions and rage tried to overpower him, he was willing with every part of his being for his mind to keep clear and focussed on whatever would keep Beth alive. He needed to do what was right this time. He promised her he would and her life depended on it.

As his mind got under control, his first thought was that he had no idea if they had more men with them. As much as he wanted to, if he went out there to kill these two, would more appear? And if they did, his chances of being outnumbered were high and his death would leave Beth vulnerable and exposed to whatever these new animals would do to her. No fucking way was that the best option then.

Peering again at where they were, he worked out that he could still have time to get him and Beth out the front and into the woods across from the entrance without the men even realising.

If it was just the two of them, he would kill them without another thought, but he didn't have time to wait around to see if there were more. He didn't want to run but it was the only thing that would keep Beth safe.

Without another thought, he gently lifted Beth into his arms and quickly turned and headed towards the front of the church, his heart thundering as he kept his ears trained on the voices which were still coming from the back.

He made it to the front door, feeling a jittery exhilaration as he realised they were getting away, before his whole world came crashing around him.

"Don't fucking move."


	20. Chapter 20

Every muscle in his body was so tight he felt like they'd snap.

They were finished. He had failed her. And this woman, standing in front of him with a gun pointed at him, was going to be the fucking end. His kept his face blank, lips in a thin line as he felt every fiber in his being hate her.

She had dark hair, tied into a ponytail that was poking out the back of her baseball cap and was standing just a few feet away from him was her gun pointed right at him.

Beth felt heavy in his arms and his crossbow burned into his back as he realised he had no way of getting to it quickly. _Fuck._

Despite the rage burning inside him, his heart began to thud as he realised they were well and truly trapped and he'd led Beth right into it.

She continued to pin him with her hard stare before calling out, "Hey! Guys! Round here!"

His ears immediately picked up the noise of the footsteps coming from round the back of the church and his mouth went dry. They were going to be out-numbered. Out-weaponed. And, as he looked down at his precious cargo - out of time. His heart felt heavy as he looked down at her. For a millisecond he let himself drift away from whatever horrors were about to come and his mind was filled with memories of her; seeing her on the farm for the first time, talking softly to Judith at the prison, the pain on her face at Hershel's death, holding him at moonshine shack, her endless teasing on the road together.

He looked up at the woman and let his eyes slide to the side tracking the two men who were coming to join her. They looked too clean, too much like before the turn and it made his skin crawl.

Both of them looked tense as they took in the situation before them and he felt his arms flex involuntarily bringing Beth closer to him as he saw them both look down at her.

The woman seemed to be taking him in and he noticed her eyes immediately narrow as she took in his crossbow on his back.

"Where are the rest of them?" She asked him sharply, suddenly holding her arms straighter, aligning the gun with his head and he heard the tell tale sound of her cocking it.

He kept his face blank, staring at her through the slits of his eyes as he tried to understand her question. She can't have meant their group, too much time had passed, so he wondered whether she was somehow trying to catch him out. His mind raced as he weighed his options, wondering if it'd be better to pretend they had numbers, more than the three people in front of them.

After a long stretch of silence, he made his decision. He didn't know what to do but knew a lie of a big group would very quickly fall apart.

"S'just us." He said simply.

Her eyes narrowed even further at this and he felt like he could almost see the rage burn through her body.

"Oh yeah? You think we don't know who you are?" She asked angrily, her mouth curled into a sneer. "Forgot that one of your little pets escaped _Len_?" She said the name as if it was poison and he felt his whole body tense in response. His jaw involuntarily clenched and his eyes narrowed further at the sound of name that had torn his world apart.

"The man with the bow is Len, that's what she said." The woman said angrily, tilting her head at the bow on his back. "And do you know what else she told us? That Len - _you_ \- were the worst. We're lucky she's still alive after what you did to her, you know that? And now here you are." Her mouth twisted into an unnatural smile as she finished. "If you think you can go around hurting people, you're fucking wrong and we're here to make sure of it."

As Daryl's mind started rolling over exactly what she just said, one of the two men spoke.

"Who is that?" He said with a pained expression looking at Beth in Daryl's arms. "And what have you done to her?" His voice was a mixture of horror and concern and he stepped forward as if to touch her.

Daryl immediately stepped back and brought Beth closer towards him.

Of all the things that Daryl was expecting, this was not it. After what happened in the cabin, he never ever wanted to see another human being apart from Beth again. He'd resigned himself that if he did, they would be dead before they even knew what hit them. Ever since the prison, all they had come across were people who wanted to hurt them and that was enough for him to give up on people all together. He was stupid for ever thinking that just because they got lucky with the prison group, that people were good. They weren't and Beth of all people had been the victim of that.

The mention of Len's name and feeling cornered by these people had his blood boiling and rage and fear coursing through him but there was something else too.

A small voice in his head that sounded like Beth's was playing over what they had said to him. They were out here looking for Len and those fucking assholes. They were looking for them to stop them hurting other people, like it sounded like they had done to one of their group.

Or were they just saying that because it was a trap? Were they just like every other fucking asshole out here, taking what they want? He wished again for Rick. Without his weapon, the only thing he could do was talk and that was not his strong point.

But he was also aware the more they stood around talking the worse Beth was getting. Maybe if they killed him, they would take her and look after her.

No fucking way. They wouldn't take her from him.

"Len. The others." Daryl started, his eyes narrowed and suspicious, but holding the woman's gaze. "They're all dead. She killed them." He gave the slightest nod at Beth in his arms as he did. "Fucking deserved it. Every last one of 'em." He didn't mean to say more, but remembering what she had to go through alone made him feel like fire was burning through him.

His narrowed eyes stayed on her as he took in the glint of surprise in her expression but it hardened again.

"Oh yeah? Well where were you?" She asked and despite doing everything in his power to keep his expression blank, he felt it slip before he righted it and the shame and sorrow flittered across his features before disappearing.

He didn't know this fucking woman and he was getting interrogated by her and was being asked about something that made him feel heavy in the pit of his stomach. He should tell her to go fuck herself. But in a way, he needed this. He needed someone to know how much he failed. He wanted to see the disgust in someone else's eyes that he felt for himself.

He considered her for a little longer as he worked out what he wanted to say.

"I - I fucked up. Didn't… didn't listen. Wasn't thinkin' straight. Then was out cold. Couldn't help her. Couldn't fucking help her." He finished quietly, trying to keep his gaze steady on them to see their reactions but shame overtook him and he felt himself look away.

When he looked back up, he could see the woman was studying him. She seemed to focus on the faded bruising on his face and his healing split lip. Still though, she looked suspiciously at him and the gun continued to be steadily trained on him.

"What's she to you?" She tilted her head and he couldn't help his eyes flicker down at Beth for a second.

What's she to him? His whole fucking world, that's what. The only thing left and the only thing he'd ever cared about and she was dying in his arms.

"Were part of a bigger group. We lost 'em. S'just us." He said quietly, looking down at Beth with a heavy heart. "Has been for a while now." He finished.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw one of the men step towards the women and gently cover her hand to lower the gun. They shared a look before the woman complied.

The same man whose hardened look seemed to now melt into a mixture of concern and suspicion spoke up.

"What happened to her?" He asked.

Daryl looked at him and again, tried to keep his face blank but couldn't control the fear he felt inside him as he thought about Beth's fate.

"Wound got infected. She's sick. Real sick." He didn't want to volunteer any more information. He didn't know these people and regardless of how they seemed to be less threatening, he didn't trust them. Just like the man by the fire in the winter who offered help, they were desperate then just like they are desperate now and they learnt then that everyone is a wolf in sheep's clothing.

The three people seemed to share a look before the man spoke up again.

"We have a place. Not too far from here. A doctor. Meds. It's safe."

Daryl felt himself curl Beth towards him and his eyes narrow at the man. Nowhere was safe. That was a lie in today's world and he felt himself mistrust the man for his easy lie. And a doctor? This was too good to be true, it was a trap and he was about to walk right into it.

However, as he looked down at Beth, he knew he was out of options. If he left her in the church and went to town, would he really find something straight away and come back in time?

She was going to die out here if he left this any longer. He thought about what Beth would do. Before the cabin, she would look at these people and feel good about them. She would trust them. Would she now though? He didn't know anymore.

After thinking on that last point he looked at them through the slits of his eyes, chewing on the side of his cheek. After another beat, he made his decision.

He felt sick and hollow in his chest as he thought of the risk he was taking but this was their last chance.

"I can't protect her from this." He said quietly and shook his head. "I need to know what you're sayin's true. She - she would believe you." He said looking down at Beth before fixing the woman with a stare as he tried to read her.

"I need to know she'd be right to." He finished.

The woman, who had by now completely lowered her gun was staring at him and despite the hardness of her features, there was a softness in her expression.

"The world's a shitty place. It's been shitty to me and by the looks of it, it's been shitty for you too, but - I promise you." She said with a serious and firm expression. "I promise you that for once - this will be something that's good. 'Know it's hard to believe... but there are still good people."

The words hit him hard in his chest and took him back to a night that seemed like a lifetime ago, the night he felt like he really saw Beth for who she was for the first time. _There are still good people,_ she'd told him. And as he stared into her eyes, he'd believed it.

Chewing on the inside of his cheek, he stared at the woman as the words resounded round his mind.

With a final glance down at Beth, hoping - praying - that he was about to make the right decision for them, he looked up at the woman again and gave a final sharp nod.

The woman considered him for a moment, before nodding back. She turned and started walking and while he kept his eyes focussed on her, he kept an uneasy eye on the men who walked to his left as he followed. While he'd agreed to go, he still felt his senses were in overdrive, acutely aware of their every move and action.

"You guys gotta name?" The woman called over her shoulder at him.

"Daryl. S'Beth." He said plainly, deciding that whatever trap or danger they might be heading towards, he was giving the strangers no advantage by sharing their names.

"OK. Well I'm Rosita. This here is Eric and Aaron. We're headin' to a place called Alexandria."


	21. Chapter 21

As they swerved past another abandoned car on the road, Daryl sat completely still on the middle seat in the back with Beth across his lap and the guy Aaron on his other side.

His skin crawled with how much he felt surrounded and trapped by these strangers and while trying to give the appearance of staring straight ahead, he took the time to take them in out of the corners of his eyes.

The biggest thing that was making him uneasy was how suddenly comfortable they seemed around him and Beth. They had their guns lowered and seemed to be staring out the windows or chatting absently about food stock. While some people - stupid people - would think that made them less threatening, it made Daryl feel even more uneasy. This level of confidence could only come from being such a threat yourself, that you don't need to feel worried. Daryl wondered whether they had numbers, soldiers perhaps, back wherever they were taking them which made them feel so confident that if Daryl tried anything he'd be captured.

He looked down at Beth again, her blonde hair pooling over his lap, and he prayed for the millionth time since they got in the car that this was the right decision. He needed more than anything for them to be telling the truth, that there would genuinely be help for her, because however many times he asked himself whether or not this was the right move, he knew she wouldn't have made it out there for much longer.

"So what happened to your group?" Rosita asked, eyeing him in the mirror as she drove. He noticed there was still a hint of suspicion in her eyes and it gave him some comfort to know that at least she still saw him as at least partly a threat.

"Had a safe place. Someone took it. We all got split up. Haven't seen 'em since." He answered. "Doubt they're still alive." He muttered the last bit more to himself, looking down at Beth as if wanting her to contradict him with her beliefs.

"Yup. Been there." Rosita said, with a clench of her jaw before looking back at the road. Before he had a chance to wonder what her experience had been, the road turned and without the woods now obstructing the view, they were on a single long road right up to what he could only describe as a fortress.

In front of them were huge metal walls that seemed to go on as far as the eye could see, with a huge gate directly in front of them. His eyes were immediately drawn the the guards standing on top of the walls holding large machine guns and he felt his eyes narrow involuntarily.

This was it. If he had any plans to try to take these three people out, he was now too late. He suddenly felt backed into a corner, like a caged animal, or worse, like a lamb being taken to slaughter. He pulled Beth closer to him and felt his jaw clench as they closed the distance to the gate.

Aaron, the man sitting in the back with him seemed to notice. "It's OK Daryl." He said calmly, raising his hand as if to touch his arm, before thinking the better of it. "We're going to get Beth help." His eyes narrowed on the man and he started to feel all his muscles tense as the reassuring voice only made him more suspicious of the impending trap.

The gates slid open as soon as they approached and Daryl felt the sweat trickle down the side of his face as they drove right in and pulled up just inside. He suddenly felt like he needed to get him and Beth out of the car before the gates shut. Once they did, they were well and truly trapped and there really was no hope.

Ignoring everything about the surroundings, he began climbing out the car, Beth in his arms, while looking up at the guard on the gate. He was huge, with a red oversized moustache that matched his hair pulled up into a grin.

"Dang my girl's made it back home! And I don't mean you Eric!" He called to them before bursting into loud, booming laughter.

He took in the roll of Rosita's eyes as his eyes began darting around trying to work out their best escape route. His senses were going into overdrive and he could hear distant chatting and a strange, familiar smell of food not cooked over fire.

"And you brought back some newcomers! Well welcome to Alexandria! Bossman'll be pleased to meet you!" He called down to them.

That was what did it for Daryl. 'Bossman' sounded much too like 'The Governor' and he made his decision then and there that he needed to get out. No fucking way is he walking into some kind of fake town run by a fucking psychopath.

He noticed that Aaron had left as soon as they arrived, presumably to get 'Bossman' so Daryl realised with a clench of his stomach that he had only a short amount of time.

Clinging Beth to him, he began stepping back silently, mentally noting that the gate was still open and Rosita had got out of the car leaving the keys in the ignition. If he could step back enough without them noticing, he could get Beth into the back seat and possibly take out the guard with his bow, before getting in the driving seat and reversing the car out of there.

His eyes darted about, acknowledging the lowered guns in both Eric and Rosita's hands as they called up to the guard about their trip. He could do this. It'll be tight, but his skin crawled with how wrong it all felt: the large metal walls, the cleanliness of even the guard, the sounds of voices and chatter that didn't belong in the world he had seen since the turn.

With just one more silent step back to take before he'd be in a position to put Beth in the car, he realised he was too late.

"Here he is!" Called the guard gesturing further into the enclosure...town whatever you want to call it.

Daryl stopped moving, gave Beth one last look, before standing up straighter, trying to make himself look as threatening as possible as he prepared to face this new Governor. His heart hammered in his chest and once again, he felt overcome with how much he hated everything.

Feeling trapped and defenceless, rage was written all over his face as the man, obscured by the Autumn sun, finally came into view.

Daryl's ears trained on his footsteps heard him take a few more steps before he stopped suddenly.

 _"_ _Daryl?"_

Daryl felt like he had lost his fucking mind. He had played Rick's voice in his head millions of times since the fall of the prison, sometimes without even meaning to, like when he was trying to work out what to do or make a decision and a memory of Rick's advice floated into his conscious. But this was different, it was clear and sharp, unlike the memories that had recently started to sound clouded or like someone else's.

As if to confirm what Daryl's mind was telling him couldn't be true, Rick came into view and Daryl ignored his neat beard, clean skin and clothes and just stared at his face feeling like all the air had left him. As Rick's eyes seemed to fill with tears, Daryl held his gaze, his expression blank before answering with a ducked nod, as he couldn't trust his own voice to speak.

The strangers looked on as Rick walked right up to Daryl and placed a strong and comforting hand on his shoulder. It felt so strange to have someone else touching him that wasn't Beth, but it was achingly familiar and he felt all the warmth and reassurance pouring through Rick's hand. Rick didn't say any more, instead nodding in response as his eyes searched Daryl's face.

It was as if he suddenly noticed Beth, looking down at her in Daryl's arms as he continued to hold his hand firmly on his shoulder. Seeing her he huffed out a short sob before stepping away as if trying to compose himself.

The reaction made Daryl suddenly shake out of his dreamlike feeling and the whole reason he was even standing there overwhelmed him and he felt urgency overcome him.

"Beth needs help." Daryl said to Rick, looking him seriously in the eye. "It's a wound, infected, not by walkers." His voice came out surprisingly steady and serious and it suddenly felt like he'd never been without Rick at all.

Rick seemed to physically pull himself together and his own serious expression mirrored Daryl.

"We'll help her." He said, staring Daryl in the eye before calling, "Aaron we need Denise! Now!"

"Already got her." Aaron's voice came from behind Rick and Daryl eyed what he assumed was Denise suspiciously as she gave an unsure smile and a slight wave before beckoning and walking towards a pristine, white house. As Daryl walked quickly towards her with Beth in his arms, he took in the curious expressions of the now silent guard and Rosita as they seemed to try and work out his connection with Rick.

Rick. This was really him. And this was Rick's doctor. Daryl's stomach did a flip as he suddenly felt a rush of confidence fill him that Beth might be OK. This was someone Rick trusted. Whatever fucking hell they'd been through, however many animals they met along the way, if this was someone Rick trusted, Daryl trusted them too.

He rushed into the makeshift surgery room set up in a pristine and well decorated lounge, before gently placing Beth on the counter. He stared at her pale and sallow face suddenly feeling useless and empty without her in his arms.

"I promise I'll try my best, but you gotta get outta here so I got the space to work." The Denise woman said it gently, trying to catch his eye as he looked down at Beth.

Looking up at Denise, he stared at her, suddenly feeling horribly uneasy about being away from Beth. He promised her he wouldn't leave her and now, when she was most vulnerable, this woman was asking him to.

"She'll be OK. Denise'll look after her, brother." He felt Rick's strong, comforting hand on his shoulder again as he came into view.

Hesitating for another second longer, Daryl nodded, before stepping outside the room, feeling too enclosed in the hallway and then right out the front door and onto the porch that he hadn't noticed in his rush to get in.

He felt strange being apart from her right away and to calm his nerves he made his mind visualise exactly where she was in the room, just a wall away from him.

Feeling suddenly overwhelmed by everything that had happened in the last few hours and the exhaustion of carrying Beth, he lowered himself onto the porch floor with his back against the wall beside the door, all the while with Rick's eyes following his every move.

Standing a few steps down, leaning against a post, Rick seemed to continue to stare at Daryl.

Feeling anxious and restless about Beth, Daryl took a bolt out and started fiddling with it in his hands.

"How'd she hurt herself?" Rick broke the silence, as if finally deciding what question he wanted to ask.

"Weren't her. Was someone else." Daryl answered, not looking up at Rick but he could see him out of the corner of his eye seem to suddenly take in Daryl's cuts and bruises on his face. Daryl didn't want to say more. He didn't want to start having to recount the horrors they'd been through. He just wanted to know that Beth was OK and that was all his mind had room for right now.

There seemed to be a long silence before Rick asked another question.

"When d'you find her?" He asked.

It took a second for Daryl to understand what he meant. When he did, he stopped fiddling with the bolt and looked up at Rick.

"Din't find her. Been with her since we lost the prison."

Rick's eyes seem to widen slightly at that and it suddenly occurred to Daryl that while he had Beth, Rick must have been alone before finding these people or forming this community.

"You been out there this whole time?" Rick asked. Holding his gaze Daryl nodded.

"Kept try'na find some place… but it never worked out for long." Daryl chewed the inside of his cheek and looked back down at his bolt as he thought back to that desperate winter, where he wished and prayed for a goddamn place.

"Shit." Rick said suddenly, running his hands over his face. "The others. I gotta tell the others . Maggie. Shit Maggie."

He seemed to almost forget Daryl was there and turned abruptly and started jogging up the street.

' _The others_ '? Daryl felt like he could hear his blood rushing in his ears as he played that sentence in his mind again and again.

The others? Maggie?

 _Holy shit._ Beth was right.

They made it. Her sister made it. They were safe. They weren't dead.

The searching after the prison fell. Constantly sticking close to the prison, while avoiding the walkers. Leaving signs in the small towns nearby. Telling Beth it was stupid even though inside he hoped and hoped others were still out there. Then the day they gave up. Feeling his heart turn heavy, seeing the sadness in her face as they decided to prioritise living over the searching. Accepting at that point that they wouldn't see them again. Rick, Judith, Carol. They were gone. He didn't grieve, Beth didn't grieve. They had to turn their backs on them and survive. Then the hours they'd spend talking in the flickering firelight about whether they were still out there. Whether they'd have gotten a break, somewhere warm, somewhere safe. Hearing the hope in Beth's voice while feeling the doubt in his heart.

And here they are. He didn't know who, but Maggie and Rick at least. In a place with walls, houses, guards, people. She was right all along. He let out a calming breath and closed his eyes, again, letting his mind visualise where he had left her next door to reassure himself she was close. As he did, his ears picked up footsteps running.

Looking down the street in the direction Rick had left, he saw Maggie running, tears streaming down her face, followed closely behind by Rick and Glenn. It felt like a punch in the stomach as he saw them and he felt lightheaded, like he was high or something.

He stood quickly, feeling like his hands were hanging uselessly at his sides as he followed them with his eyes as they ran up to the porch. Before he even had a chance to realise what was happening, Maggie tore up the steps and throwing the front door open, ran straight into the house. He went to follow her, suddenly tense at what Denise had said about needing the space to work on Beth before Rick put a hand on his chest.

"I got it man." He said, before turning and walking into the house, leaving Daryl and Glenn on the porch.

Before Daryl realised what was happening, Glenn pulled him into a hug and again, he felt overwhelmed by how strange it was to feel someone who wasn't Beth.

Daryl stepped away abruptly, leaving Glenn grinning in front of him.

"So I definitely thought one day you'd just rock up at the gates. Knew you'd be out there living like Georgia's version of Rambo. But yeah, definitely thought you'd be alone, not carrying an unconscious Beth. Anyway I've had this stored away for when the time came. Grabbed them just as we were running out the door."

Glenn grinned and presented Daryl with an unopened pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Daryl huffed a laugh and took one gently. He lit one up, feeling the burn in his chest and despite feeling overwhelmed by how he missed that feeling, his expression quickly turned serious again, thinking about Beth on the other side of the wall.

He heard a commotion, Maggie's strained voice, Denise and Rick's calming tones before the front door opened suddenly and Maggie came out.

She turned to him quickly, tears still streaming down her face and an urgency to her expression.

"Rick said someone did this to her, who did it?" She asked urgently looking at him, but as if she wasn't really seeing him.

Daryl stared at her thinking about how Beth is going feel when she sees her.

"Don't matter. They're dead." Daryl answered plainly, as he blew out a cloud of smoke.

Maggie stared at him and he felt strangely like he was suddenly coming into focus in her eyes. Her expression softened and she stood in front of him, gently touching his shoulder.

"Thank you. Thank you for keeping her safe all this time." She said with tears streaming down her face.

Daryl felt his blank expression fall into a frown as he turned away from her as the shame overtook him.

"I didn't." He answered quietly looking shamefully at the floor. "She had to do it herself. Din't have a choice." He finished, suddenly realising how none of them had any idea what Beth had been through.

"She's gonna to be OK Daryl." Maggie said softly looking at Daryl. "Denise said she's gonna be OK."

Daryl nodded slightly, feeling a creeping and ominous unease at how much Maggie misunderstood.

Beth had changed. She had no choice but to. And if Maggie thought that patching her up would bring her old Beth back again she was wrong.


	22. Chapter 22

It was two days before Beth finally properly woke up. She had been in a fitful fever before that, tossing and turning and waking up long enough to ask for Daryl before passing back out again. He had strayed as far as the porch the whole time and every time she had asked for him, he'd been right there.

Rick and Maggie both had misinterpreted his need to be there. He could tell Rick thought Daryl didn't think Alexandria was safe and was reluctant to leave Beth because of his role as a protector. He got the impression that Maggie thought that Daryl had seen himself as Beth's chaperone with his sole aim of getting her back to Maggie and now that he had, she kept trying to reassure him that he was welcome to leave her now and go and catch up with the others.

Neither of those were right - he didn't want to leave her because he couldn't remember who he was without her. It had been the two of them for so long it was like there was an elastic band around them; every time he got too far away from her he had an overwhelming need to get back by her side.

The others, of which there were plenty, could wait. They had all come to see him, nearly their whole prison family and he stared in disbelief as one after the other Judith, Carl, Michonne, Carol, Sasha smiled warmly, patting him on the shoulder for making it.

Aaron and Eric, the guys who had picked them up by the church, were good to him. They had no preconceived ideas of why Daryl needed to stay with Beth, they didn't seem to ask and didn't seem to wonder on it, but they brought him food and clothes and made sure his sleeping spot in the chair in Beth's room was comfortable.

When Beth finally properly woke with a clear mind, it was the middle of the day and it was just Daryl in the room. He had been asleep in the chair but his eyes snapped open at the sound of his name being croaked.

He stood immediately and went to Beth's bedside, standing awkwardly not too close and said her name gently. She took in his face but then as she did, her eyes shifted and she took in the whole room, stared at the bed covers, heard the chatter from people outside and she panicked.

Throwing back her covers she noted that Denise had changed her clothes, meaning she was without her boots, her knife and was in soft, impractical pyjamas.

He saw the fear and panic in her eyes and before he had a chance to do anything she was climbing quickly out of bed on the side where her stuff was, furthest away from the door.

Flailing frantically, she grabbed her pack while trying to pull on her jeans over the pyjamas. Daryl went to stand in front of her and tried to get her to look at him to calm her panic.

"Beth." Daryl said urgently, remembering exactly how he felt when they first arrived. "Beth, s'OK -"

"Shit, where's my knife." He heard the urgency and desperation in her voice and he took her gently by either bicep.

"Beth." He said again, in his gentlest voice. At the same time she found her knife in her pack she finally looked up into his eyes, dropping the pack as she did.

"Beth, you're safe." He said softly, trying to convey with his eyes now that he had her attention. He was still holding her by either bicep, rubbing his thumbs soothingly over her skin.

"We're safe Beth, I promise you. We made it." She stared at him and he saw the panic in her expression slowly disappear. He saw the trust in her eyes and with her free hand, she lifted it up and cupped his face.

"We made it?" She whispered softly with a wonderment to her tone as her eyes searched his face.

The warmth, smell and comfort that could come from one touch from Beth blew his mind and he felt his eyes close gently as the relief of her being OK and right here in front of him overwhelmed him.

Puncturing the silence, there was a clear of a throat from behind Beth and his eyes snapped open to take in Rick and Maggie standing by the door staring at them.

Before he had a chance to realise what was happening, Beth had spun around was holding her knife up, standing protectively in front of an unarmed Daryl.

Both Rick and Maggie seemed to tense and for a moment Beth didn't move and Daryl wondered for a second whether she recognised them.

Still holding her knife out in front of her she turned to look at Daryl in disbelief and he gave a ducked nod and a quirked smile in response.

With a sob she dropped the knife to the floor and rushed towards Maggie who tore towards her and they met in the middle in a heap of limbs and tears.

 _Faith._ Daryl thought to himself as he looked on feeling in awe of Beth's belief being true.

He glanced up at Rick who seemed to be considering him. He immediately schooled his features suddenly feeling very exposed, as if caught watching the sisters reunion was somehow wrong.

He thought back to all the times he wondered what the group would think if they could see them together, how close they'd got surviving side by side. Him and Beth were nothing to each other before, so was the image of them standing there the reason Rick was looking at him curiously? Was Daryl not even able to comfort Beth when she was scared without feeling like he was doing something wrong? The image of them in the cabin kitchen with Beth on the worktop and his hands on her ass pulling her against him flashed up into his mind suddenly and he didn't feel so indignant any more, his face flushing red as he took a subconscious step back from Beth and Maggie.

"Just wait 'til you see the others!" Maggie sobbed. Beth turned to him in wonderment at her statement.

"The others?!" She asked him, her eyes wide and her face breaking into one of her big, open smiles that he could only stare and hold his breath at in response.

"See!" She exclaimed excitedly before walking over to him and jabbing him in the chest. "I told you! I told you they'd make it!" She laughed and _god,_ he had missed her laugh so so much his chest ached.

"Just wait 'til you see Judith." Rick said and it was like she suddenly realised he was there.

"Judy?" Beth whispered, her eyes filling with tears as she walked to Rick and embraced him into a hug.

Maggie walked over and grabbed her hand.

"Oh Beth! She's gonna be so happy to see you! But! We're saving that for later, we're gonna have a party tonight where you'll see her and the others, but for now I can't wait for you to see our house, you're gonna laugh so hard when you see the size of it, oh and Glenn! He saw you yesterday but he's so excited to see you awake, let's get you changed into some clothes in the other room, then we'll go straight to see Glenn…"

As Maggie chatted excitedly at Beth, she pulled her out the room and Beth glanced back at Daryl uncertainly before disappearing.

Daryl suddenly felt a strange hollowness in his chest as he stood there with his arms hanging uselessly at his side. He couldn't exactly follow her, she was with her sister. He tried to interpret her look, but couldn't understand what he was meant to do with it. He looked at the floor before realising Rick was still there looking at him.

"You got back to us man." Rick said to him. When Daryl didn't say anything he changed the topic. "Aaron and Eric have set your stuff up in their spare room for now. Don't have to stay with them. But the offers there." He finished, giving Daryl last pat on the shoulder before walking out, leaving Daryl feeling as empty as the room he was standing in.

Later, after having scoped out the town, feeling overwhelmed by how large it was and the lack of alertness of most of its residents, he found Eric and Aaron's house and found his new bedroom. It felt so clean and clinical and he decided immediately there was no way he'd be sleeping in the big bed that was in the middle of the room. He stared for a moment at his pathetic looking pack, containing all his life's belongings, in the corner of the room. He didn't fail to notice that it was just his - Beth's was nowhere to be seen.

Feeling too enclosed inside, he sat on the porch and lit a cigarette, his ears picking up immediately the sound of Beth's quiet footsteps. He noted they were alone and he felt strange and uncomfortable at the thought of her just walking around by herself. But it wasn't just him and her anymore. He had no claim over her safety. It wasn't just the Beth and Daryl partnership where they make decisions together. She didn't need that now.

And he didn't know how he felt about that. He wanted this more than anything - for her to have her family back and be happy. He thought about all the times he wished for a group but didn't want to trust new people. Isn't this the perfect solution? There was a group for her. With people he trusted. And with new people that they trusted.

This would help keep her mind off the horrors they'd been through together and she could be her sunny self without him dragging her down.

Hell, after what happened at the cabin, this could be her opportunity to cut ties with him altogether after he'd failed her. His frown deepened as he started to mull on the fact that after what happened, she was with him and stuck with him but she didn't exactly have a choice. After what he did, she probably wanted to get as far away from him as possible but there was no one else.

Here, she could do that. She didn't need to see his face as a constant reminder of what he let happen.

"Hey." She said, standing at the bottom of the steps looking up at him. She seemed happy, excited and her smile took his breath away. She must have showered because her hair and skin seemed to glow and her blonde hair took on a sandy colour where it was still wet. _She was fucking beautiful_.

"Hey yourself." He answered, he tried to make it playful and teasing but he couldn't shake the frown on his face as he said it, the uncertainty that he seemed to be losing her taking hold of him.

"Come on let's go!" She said excitedly.

"Go where?" He said, thinking all he wanted was for her to answer 'the woods' and for them to get away from all this, the enclosed spaces, the huge numbers of people, and go back to how everything was before the cabin.

"The party!" She said and rolled her eyes at him.

"Ain't goin' to no party." He said curtly taking another drag of his cigarette.

He expected her to shrug, at worst get mad, maybe tell him to shove it and go off to the party on her own.

Instead, the light seemed to literally fade in her eyes, her smile slowly slipped away and it was replaced with a mixture of sadness and fear. In an instant, the shiny, confident and sunny Beth was gone. It made his stomach clench. She looked at him considering him and he stared back blankly, feeling an overwhelming urge to get up and pull her into a hug.

"I.. I can't do this without you." She whispered quietly, looking at the ground now. "It don't feel right."

He blew out another slow curl of smoke as he listened.

"Not our family of course, I'm so grateful and happy we've got them back." She stumbled quickly over the last sentence, eager to show that she was not ungrateful for being given the one thing she wanted more than anything in the world.

"Just the walls." She seemed to look at the floor before continuing. "Been hard today. Maggie, it's been great it's just - it's a lot. A lot of noise and so much - so much stuff that they don't need. I know you woulda thought it was all stupid like I did. Everything so white and clean. And it felt all too enclosed. Like I was trapped you know?" She looked up at him as if waiting for his confirmation. He stared at her blankly through the slits of his eyes, the smoke from his cigarette curling up around him.

"I - I needed you. Din't feel right. Being alone. And the people." She continued quietly, looking afraid now. "We have our family. But I don't know the rest of 'em. Don't know who they are. Don't know if they're good. What they could do." She said the last sentence so quietly as she looked at the ground he wasn't even sure he'd heard her correctly.

He took another drag and blew out his smoke, considering her for the moment. He realised he had been feeling angry with her. Angry that she was so quick to slot in when he'd stood around uselessly wondering what to do. Despite him trying to tell himself that it was good for her and it was right, he wanted their partnership. It made him feel like he was worth something and he didn't know how to be himself without it.

But he realised that if it was the choice between her no longer needing him, or this sad and scared Beth, he knew what he'd choose in a heartbeat. This wasn't who she was and he hated that the outside world had made her this way. They had been out there too long, with no one else but eachother and it'd taken away some of who she was. It'd taken away her hope and her trust and she didn't deserve that. She deserved to be happy, surrounded by friends and family she felt comfortable with, not out in the wild, becoming near feral with someone who didn't even deserve to be within ten feet of her. Seeing this place, where she would fit in so well, was already opening his mind to that.

He decided then and there that he'd be there for her and keep her feeling safe as she navigated this new place. And once she was OK and didn't need him anymore, he needed to keep away and stop his mind thinking about her every waking moment. He would stick to the shadows, keep this place fed and guarded as directed by Rick and he'd watch out for her and that'd be it.

After feeling like he had been staring at her for a lifetime, he finally nodded at her, before pushing himself off the ground.

"They'll be good Beth. Rick trusts 'em. They'll be good."


End file.
